


2 Hearts

by Joyful_SVU



Category: Wentworth (TV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:20:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29252100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joyful_SVU/pseuds/Joyful_SVU
Summary: When going to a strip club for her best mates bachelorette party, Bea Smith gets the attention of one of the dancers who works there, Allie Novak. That curiosity goes both ways as Bea finds herself never being able to forget the woman she met there. Being in a troubling marriage with a man she doesn't love, and a daughter who is the only reason she forces herself to survive; Bea starts to find out what it's like to actually live and what it feels like to fall in love.
Relationships: Allie Novak/Bea Smith, Ballie - Relationship
Comments: 64
Kudos: 93





	1. The Beginning

Bea POV 

I didn't understand why Franky was dragging me along for all of this. I didn't go out, mainly because Harry didn't like me to, but partially because I didn't enjoy it either. I felt suffocated at bars, by the noise, the people. 

But Franky was getting married tomorrow and she wanted to go out with a bang. She wanted to hit every club, drink us all to the ground, and enjoy her last night before she married her fiancée. Franky and Bridget had been together for going on 4 years now. They were a cute couple and looked perfect together. 

I was Franky's best "man" but Boomer was the one that planned everything for the bachelorette party. Boomer picked out each club we would be going to, and said she had a surprise at the end. I was sitting in the stretch car Boomer had ordered going to yet another bar where Boomer said we could dance at. 

I looked at the time on my watch and saw that it wasn't late enough for Franky to consider letting me go. I didn't want to be here, the later I stayed the worse it'd be. Unless Harry drank himself to sleep and passed out then maybe I could get away with being out late but if he wasn't, I didn't want to give him any more reasons to get angry. He warned me before I left the house, "Don't get any ideas. Don't do anything stupid and if I found out you were batting you eyelashes for any prick in the place you'll regret it." He let go of my hair that he had been pulling and pushed me towards the dresser. I hit myself in the stomach from the impact and went to go rub the area of my head he had pulled. 

I seemed to have zoned out because Maxine put her hand on my leg, "You alright love?"

I nodded, "Fine, just don't want to be out too late. Don't like leaving Deb."

"Oh hun, I'm sure she's fine. Harry's home right?"

I nodded again, that didn't give me any reassurance. He had never hit Deb but I didn't like her seeing him get drunk. She was 15 years old and I didn't want her getting ideas that because her dad can do it, she could to. 

We pulled up to a bar and got out. Franky and Boomer were drinking right away whilst Liz went to go sit at a table nearby. I went over to her, "You sure you should be here?"

"Oh I'm fine Bea really. Boomer begged me to come and I haven't gone out in a long time. It's nice just to get out of the house you know?"

"Sure."

Doreen and Boomer were dancing and Maxine was at the bar with Franky. Franky came and put a shot in front of me, "Come on Red!"

"I don't feel like getting drunk tonight Franky, you shouldn't either. Your wedding is tomorrow!" I spoke up because of the noise from the music. 

"As if this would affect you, plus I'll be fine tomorrow. I'm not taking no for an answer, come on drink up." She kept pushing it my way and I took it just to shut her up.

Franky cheered and handed me another one. I made a face at her and she put her arm around me, "You're my best mate, my best man, you gotta." She put the drink to my lips and I took the shot. 

If this was any indication of how the night was going to continue, this was going to be fucking awful. Boomer looked at the time and said it was time to go. She seemed very giddy when we were in the car until we stopped. "Okay okay, so you know I love ya and I know that something you really like is hot bitches so that's what I got ya."

Maxine spoke up, "Booms, please tell me you didn't get her a prostitute."

"Nah, strippers." We got out of the car and we looked up to see lights, and music blaring from inside a strip club. 

"And this isn't just for Franky, I know she likes the girl, but it's like unisex. They have male and female strippers. This is gonna be awesome!" 

Everyone kind of cheered while I wanted nothing more than to go home. I couldn't be here. The only reason Harry even let me come was because he knew Franky was into chicks and wouldn't have male strippers. They started to walk in and I stayed back. 

Maxine looked at me, "Hun, come on."

I shook my head, "I don't like this Maxine. I'm not into all of this you know that."

"I know, but it's one night. We probably won't be here long. Plus, I know Harry is the jealous type but he doesn't have to know."

I groaned, "If I'm going in there, I need a drink."

Maxine laughed and pulled me in with her. I ordered a stiff drink and downed it. There were men and women everywhere and I really didn't want to be here. Boomer was already letting a guy dance on her while Franky sat at the bar with me, "You hate this don't ya?"

"I want you to be happy and enjoy yourself but this isn't my scene."

"I know, bloody Booms. I told her no strippers."

"What, you don't like all of this?"

"When I was single sure but it feels wrong. Look, I'll hang here with you. I'll have to get a quick dance at some point or else it will hurt Bommer's feelings but I'll stick with you for most of it. I feel like she did this more for her and them anyway which is fine. Look, they're enjoying themselves."

I saw Liz, Doreen, Maxine, and Boomer tipping a male stripper. I thanked Franky and we ordered some more drinks to pass the time. At some point Boomer came over and grabbed Franky's hand pulling her up and having her sit in a chair in the middle. I moved to the back of the room and sat away from all of it. An announcement was made that there was a bachelorette in the house. 

I rolled my eyes and kept to myself. One of the male strippers looked like he was coming near me and I shook my head, "I'm good, believe me."

A song started to play that I didn't recognize and the lights shined to the main stage. Someone announced the next performer, Alliecat. I looked at the time and wished we could just get out of here already. 

As the music continued a woman came out and started to dance. She was tall and blonde. I had this weird feeling, like a pull to her. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. She was definitely pretty but I couldn't figure out why I was so intrigued by her. 

Allie POV 

I got ready to get on stage, I was wearing a black lace bodysuit with thigh high garters. It was a pretty full night. I only had one number and then I'd have to work the floor until closing. I heard my stage name being announced and looked myself in the mirror quickly. I had my hair down with a smoky eye and looked hot. 

I heard the beginning of the song 2 hearts by Kylie Minogue. I always liked performing to it, it made me feel sexy. I wore a black long blazer over my outfit just to give a revealing effect that men generally liked. Even though this was a coed club, men still came just to see the women, and women came just to see the men. 

I came out and started to move my body to the music. I was told about a woman who was brought in for her bachelorette party but women dancers were requested which I was grateful for. On the rare occasion did we get women asking for women dancers and it always made me feel safer. Women were kinder and gentler, men were rough and mean. 

I walked towards her, she had black hair and was covered in tattoos. I removed the blazer and moved so she could get a full look at me. Her friends seemed to be enjoying it more than she really was which made me think she really didn't ask to be brought here. I danced on her but didn't touch her the way I usually did with people getting lap dances. She didn't touch me either and seemed to try to avert her gaze from me as much as possible. I bent down and whispered in her ear, "I can stop if you'd like. Move on to someone else."

She nodded and mouthed thank you. I got back up on the main stage and moved around the pole. I noticed a woman sitting in the back. It was hard to see her face completely because of the lights in my face, but she had fiery red hair. Our eyes locked and I felt this strange connection to this stranger. She seemed to blush and I wanted to know more about her. She seemed out of place, like she didn't belong here. When the song ended people applauded and I collected my tips. I wanted to walk over to her but I didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, more than she already looked. 

The woman I had danced on earlier came over to talk to me as I got down from the stage, "Hey, uh thanks for earlier. You did a great job but I just wasn't expecting to get brought here and-"

"Let me guess, you love your fiancée?"

She nodded and I laughed, "Happens more than you'd think. No worries, I could tell you weren't really feeling it." I looked over to the back and saw the redhead again. She was drinking something and talking to another woman. I could see her a little more clearly now and she was beautiful. 

"If you thought I wasn't feeling it, she wouldn't feel it either." The brunette added.

"Not sure what you mean."

"I saw you, when you were dancing. You never took your eyes off of her. I could feel the tension from where I was sitting."

I scoffed, "I'm a dancer. I was looking around the room."

"Yeah right." She seemed to get an idea. "How much do you charge for a private dance?"

"I thought you weren't into it? Or maybe, you just wanted to get me alone."

"Nah, not for me. For a friend."

Bea POV 

I felt her eyes burning into me while she was dancing. It's like she could see right through me and what scared me was I liked it. Franky's dance was quick and short but when she got back on the stage its like she demanded attention. I found myself looking at her in a way I generally wouldn't look at anyone. 

Her and Franky spoke for a bit and then she walked away for a bit to talk to someone at the bar. Franky came over to me, "So Red, how ya feeling?"

"Tired, can I go home now?"

"After."

"After what?"

"I got you a private dance."

"Franky no. I don't want some guy touching me."

"Well then, good thing I'm not a guy." The blonde dancer came over to me. 

I couldn't speak, I couldn't get the words out. 

"I'm Allie."

"Hi." I felt my mouth go dry and I couldn't explain why. 

"Your friend here paid for a dance for you. And if you're okay with it, I'd like it if you would follow me."

"I can't really-I shouldn't."

"One dance, come on."

I felt like everyone was staring at me and Franky had the biggest grin on her face. I was going to kill her. I slowly nodded and she put her hand out. I grabbed it and she intertwined her hand with mine. "Let's go."

"I'm gonna fucking kill you." I told Franky who erupted in laughter with everyone else. 

I followed Allie to an area in the back with dark curtains covering specific areas. Allie opened one and I followed her inside. It was small but had a couch, a pole, and alcohol. She sat me down and poured me a drink. "So, do I get a name?"

"Bea." 

"Alright Bea, first time?"

I nodded, "I've never been to a place like this and it's not for me."

"Don't worry about it. Part of my job is to make sure you enjoy yourself. I want you to relax and just let go."

"Sure." I took a sip of my drink. 

"Bea, if you don't want the dance, I don't have to do it. I can tell you aren't thrilled about it, we can just talk."

I was about to agree and say I didn't want the dance. I didn't really want her touching me but instead I said, "It's fine. I'm okay." I don't know why I said it. I had an out instead I agreed and she stood up. 

"Okay then." She turned around and I was facing her ass. I moved my face to the side and she slowly sat down on top of me. Moving herself on top of me and I felt my face turn red. She moved against me and I started to get this weird sensation below my stomach. She turned around and straddled me and swayed her hips. She put her hands on my shoulders and used them to help guide her movements. Before I knew it my hands were on her sides, holding her hips in place. She smiled and looked at me, "what do you want me to do?"

I looked at her and I couldn't get the words out. I didn't know what she meant but I didn't want her to stop what she was doing. I liked her being on top of me, I liked feeling her body on top of mine. I've never felt that way before. She looked me in my eyes and it seemed like our faces were getting closer together. All the music in the club faded away, I couldn't hear anything or see anything other than her. She leaned in and kissed me, I kissed her back. It wasn't like Harry, it was soft and sweet. I felt my eyes close as she licked my bottom lip asking for permission. I opened my mouth and moaned when I felt her tongue in my mouth. She deepened the kiss and grinded against me. I put my hand behind her neck and pulled her in closer to me. When we separated my eyes were still closed and when I opened them, her bright blue eyes were looking at me with a smile on her face. "If I knew you were this good of a kisser I would have given you the lap dance instead of Franky."

Hearing Franky's name brought me back to reality and I gently pushed her away. "Oh fuck. I can't believe I did that, I'm sorry that should have never happened." 

I got up and Allie grabbed my hand. "Bea wait, hold on."

"I have to go."

"Bea, you didn't do anything wrong. I kissed you. Why are you so worried?"

"Because I'm married and it was wrong. Harry is going to murder me, I can't believe I just did that."

"Okay wait hold on, listen. I don't know who this Harry guy is but he is not going to murder you. It was one kiss, hell of a great one, but it was just a kiss. He doesn't have to know. It happens a lot, more than you'd think. Don't worry." She squeezed my hand, "But, don't forget it, because I know I won't. Best kiss I've ever had." She put a strand of hair behind my ear and whispered, "Made me so wet."

I felt chills run down my spine. "I should go." I ran out of the room and back into the main area. 

Franky was grinning from ear to ear. "So, how'd it go?"

"I hate you." I grabbed my bag and walked out. 

Allie POV 

I broke the rule. Not really the clubs rules because they don't really care what you do in the back rooms as long as it doesn't cause trouble. I broke my rules. Don't fall for a client, and I'm pretty sure I just did. The moment I saw her I knew I wanted her. Just my luck that Franky was friends with Bea and wanted to play a prank on her by letting me give her a dance. I just wanted to get her alone to know more about her. She was shy and reserved, but seeing her up close she was beautiful, stunning. 

I was thrilled when she agreed to the dance and dancing on her got me hot and bothered. Straddling her so I was on top of her was a thrill and when she finally put her hands on me, I don't think I'd ever been more excited. I couldn't look anywhere else other than her lips, I needed a taste. When I kissed her I felt alive, when she kissed me back it was like I had never been kissed before. 

She was amazing and she didn't even know it. I was so turned on after that quick make out session that if she had tried to fuck me I would have let her. But then she panicked and freaked out thinking about her husband, of course she had to be fucking straight. 

This couldn't have backfired more. A hot chick, with great lips, had to be married. Not only married, but to a man. After I finished my shift I went to go change out of what I was wearing. I put on some jeans and an oversized sweater. I took my makeup off and walked to the bus stop. Sitting, waiting for for my stop to get closer I couldn't stop thinking about her. I never let the clients get into my head but she did. 

When I got to my apartment I opened the door and walked in. Throwing my stuff on the couch I made myself a sandwich and spent the rest of the night thinking about Bea the red head. 

Bea POV 

After leaving the strip club I got dropped off at home and prayed a silent prayer that Harry was asleep. I walked in to all the lights being off. I removed my shoes so I wouldn't make any noise. There was a mess in the kitchen even though I had left it spotless before I left. I looked over and he was sleeping on the couch, I could smell the booze. I went to go check on Deb who was sound asleep and I walked to my bedroom. I thanked God he was passed out and got undressed and ready for bed. As I laid there I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened with Allie. 

I never felt that way about anyone, not even Harry. The way she looked at me, touched me, kissed me, it felt like I had a fire inside of me. I hated kissing Harry, but Allie made me want more. This couldn't be happening. I was in my mid 30's having a mid life crisis about a stripper I've only met once. I needed to forget about her and what happened tonight. 

I was never going to see her again, it was just a one time thing. I was married and I wasn't a cheater. And even if I was, Harry would kill me if he ever found out. He was always jealous of guys, I don't think he ever saw a girl coming. Hell, neither did I. 

I tried to close my eyes and get some sleep for the wedding but all I could think about was Allie, those bright blue eyes, and that beautiful smile.


	2. The Night We Met

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the wonderful comments! Makes me really excited about writing this story.

Bea POV 

I woke up early and quickly showered. I needed to meet Franky at her place in less than 2 hours. But if the house wasn't clean by the time I did, Harry would throw a fit. I did my best to clean up the mess he had made last night without making too much noise. He was always cranky after a night of drinking. I made breakfast for him and Deb and heard him start to wake. 

I put a cup of coffee in front of him and two aspirins, "Morning. I'm working on breakfast now."

He grunted and took the pills. "What time did you get in."

"Little after midnight." There was no point in lying to him so I told him the truth. If he somehow caught me in a lie, it always made things worse. 

"Hmmm, what time do you need me there."

"Wedding starts at 1. If you don't want to face traffic or the pain of looking for parking, you and Deb should try to get there a little earlier."

"We'll get there when we get there."

I didn't try to push or argue, I knew better. I went into the bedroom and grabbed some of my things. "Okay, I'm heading over to Franky's. Breakfast is on the stove. I'll see you guys later."

He got up to go shower and I finished grabbing my stuff. Deb came out of her room, "Morning mum."

"Morning sweetheart." I went over and kissed her forehead. "I'm going to Franky's. Make sure you guys aren't late. You know your dad."

She laughed, "Believe me I know. We'll be there."

"Okay, breakfast is on the stove. I love you."

"To the moon and back."

I smiled and drove to Franky's. I spent the morning doing her hair and everyone else's. Maxine did everyone's makeup. Once it got closer in time for the wedding I saw Debbie and Harry outside of the venue. I was wearing a black bridesmaid dress that Franky had chosen on. "Wow mom, you look amazing."

I gave her a smile, "Go ahead and sit down, we should be starting soon."

Harry came over to me, "Dress is a little short for a wedding don't you reckon."

"I didn't get to pick it Harry."

"Watch your tone."

He went to sit next to Deb and I watched how quickly he could switch it on and off. He was the nicest guy in everyone else's view. He was a monster when we were alone and no one ever knew, well other than Liz. She was like a mother to me, to all of us. She knew, she's always known. She clocked it way before I had ever started to accidentally drop hints. She could see right through him and I think he hated how he couldn't manipulate her. 

When she and I would have moments alone to talk she'd try to get me to consider leaving but it seemed like something inconceivable. I went to join Boomer and Franky up front and we waited for the music to start and Bridget to walk down.

It was a beautiful wedding, Franky's little sister Tess was the flower girl and she looked adorable. Franky and Bridget looked happy and in love. Part of me felt jealous, not an angry kind of jealousy, but a jealousy of want. I wanted something like that, a love like what they have. Marrying Harry was out of pure belief that it was something I needed to do, not something I wanted to do. The only good think that came out of this shit marriage was Debbie. She pushed me everyday to continue and carry on without even realizing she was doing it. 

As we all sat to hear people do toasts, eat, drink and joke around I felt like I couldn't even enjoy myself because of Harry's arm around me. He was marking his territory which I never understood, no one was looking at me, no one wanted me, which he never failed to remind me when we were alone. 

Last night came up and everyone was laughing and joking about the bars we went to and how bad Doreen got at the end of the night. And then it came up in a way I knew I was going to have to pay for later. It was unintentional but Boomer brought it up, "Oh yeah and then when Bea got the lap dance, really fucking funny. Her face when she got taken to the back was hilarious."

Everyone was laughing except for Liz. Harry was pretending not to care but his grasp around me was tightening in a way I was sure would bruise. I let out a nervous laugh. 

He kept pressing the topic, "Really, must have been fun huh. Did you all enjoy yourselves?"

"We had a great time!" Maxine smiled. 

"That's good." He tightened his grasp and I made eye contact with Liz who seemed worried. Towards the end of the night, after Bridget and Franky had gone, Liz came over to me. "Love, I'm worried about you. Bommer and her big mouth."

"It's fine Liz, it was an accident."

"That you're going to have to pay for."

"Liz, I'm used to it. I'll be alright."

"Oh Bea." She pulled me into a hug and I said goodbye to everyone. 

Harry drove us home, Debbie was on her phone and I could feel Harry's anger beginning to radiate. When we got home, Debbie went straight to bed and I started to clean the kitchen. After picking up I got changed out of my dress when I felt someone standing behind me. I closed my eyes and prayed for this to be over sooner rather than later. Harry grabbed me, putting his hands on my arms, "So you had a fun little lap dance huh."

"Harry, wait let me explain."

"Do you like making me look like an idiot? Huh!" He back handedly slapped me and I fell to the ground. He picked me up and put his hand on my neck. "What was he like huh? You liked having some bloke touching you."

"It wasn't a guy." I coughed out. He slowly let go of the grip he had on my neck, "It was a girl. Franky thought it would be funny as a joke to get a girl to dance on me."

I don't know what I expected him to do, but laugh wasn't it, "she got you a chick." He kept laughing and he let me go. I moved to rub the the area on my neck as he continued to laugh. "What, does that dyke want to make you one too. Did you enjoy it?"

Thinking back at Allie dancing on me, kissing me, touching me. "No," I lied.

He scoffed, "Of course you didn't frigid bitch. But don't worry, I know what you do like."

I hated that I knew what that meant. I wanted to die in that moment watching him take his belt off. 

The next morning I woke up in pain trying to forget what happened last night. I put on a long sleeve and made breakfast for Debbie and Harry. I drank a cup of coffee and looked myself in the mirror in the hall. My neck didn't look that bad, bit of concealer would cover it up. My arms would need to be covered up with long sleeves or sweaters for the next couple of days. 

I showered and wore a turtle neck, it was Sunday so I didn't have work today. Harry was most likely going to go golfing with his buddies and then go drinking after. Him being out of the house was always a blessing. Debbie was most likely just going to be hanging around the house doing homework so it would be me and her. I cherished moments like that with her because no matter how big she got, she was still my baby. 

Debbie and I sat down to eat and Harry took some bites of food here and there, "I'll be back later."

I nodded and he kissed Deb on the head. He grabbed his things and once I heard his car roll out of the driveway I felt like I could breathe again. 

"Isn't it a little warm to be wearing a turtle neck?" Debbie asked me. 

"I was feeling chilly. Were you just going to hang around the house today?" I asked hoping she'd buy my answer.

"Yeah I think so. Ugh, the weekends are so short."

I smiled, "Did you want something special to eat tonight?"

"Lasagna?" She grinned. 

I grabbed her plate and mine and kissed her forehead, "fine." I went to go wash dishes while she went to go shower. I didn't have all the ingredients so I needed to go to the store. After I made a list of the things I needed, I told Deb I was going to the store and I'd be back later. 

When I got to the store I quickly picked out everything I needed to get and when I was in the bakery area of the store I heard the voice that had been haunting me at night, "Well hi stranger."

Allie POV 

I worked a late night and was exhausted in the morning. I woke up late and starving. I made a quick breakfast sandwich but realized that my fridge and pantry was basically empty. I groaned and got showered, dressed and went to the store. The super market wasn't far from my apartment so I didn't have to take the bus but I'd have to carry everything back to my place so I had to remind myself not to get too much. 

I grabbed a cart and got some things that would hold me over for a while. I didn't ever buy anything crazy, I lived alone and could kinda cook so I made pretty basic things. I decided to get something sweet for later on because I didn't have work tonight so I was just gonna put on a movie and stay home. 

I walked over to see what kind of desserts there was when I saw red hair from the corner of my eye. I couldn't believe my luck. I hadn't stopped thinking about her since Friday night and to see her now was like some kind of sign. I decided to go over to her and talk to her, "Well hi stranger."

She turned around and her eyes widened, "Allie, hi."

"Hey. Now imagine my surprise when I see a hot red head over here who happens to be the same person who's been on my mind for the last couple of days."

She blushed which made me smile, "I uh-it's nice to see you too." 

She started to push her cart to leave and I put my hand on top of hers. "Woah, hold on. What's the rush."

"I have to get home, get started on dinner."

I nodded but didn't want her to leave. "I'm sure dinner can wait for a quick talk with a friend."

"You're no friend of mine."

"You don't rule by charm do ya Bea?" I grinned. She rolled her eyes and I got a bit closer to her, "but don't worry about it. Because I don't know about you, but I don't really kiss my friends."

I could see her start to turn red. 

I leaned in a bit more so we were face to face, "And kissing you was definitely the highlight of my night, seeing you again, highlight of my week." I squeezed her hand and she slightly squeezed it back which excited me.

"I really have to go, I have to make dinner before Harry gets back and I promised Deb I'd make her lasagna."

"Deb?"

"My daughter."

"How old."

"15," she smiled. 

"Wow, you look amazing to have a teenager. You just don't fail to surprise me."

She looked at me and moved her hand away from mine, "Allie, I don't know what you're doing or what you're trying to do. Nothing can happen between us and Friday night was just a slip."

I internally rolled my eyes and nodded, "Sure. But that doesn't mean we can't hang out, talk."

"I can't."

"What, we can't be friends?"

"You really want to be just friends?" She quizzed.

"Not really but it's better than nothing."

"Allie, I'm not someone you should want to be friends with. I'm boring, I live a normal life and spend all my time looking after my daughter."

"With the crazies I hang around with on a daily basis, boring sounds great." I wasn't going to let her push me away. This woman controlled my thoughts for the past couple of days and I wasn't going to let her just disappear on me. "Look, how about I give you my number and we can grab a drink or some coffee one day. It's one day, nothing will happen I promise. I'll keep my hands to myself. We can just talk."

She seemed to be thinking the offer over and nodded, "fine."

"Great, it's a date." She shot me a glare and I laughed, "relax. It's a joke." 

She handed me her phone and I imputed my number and sent myself a text. "See easy. I'll talk to you later beautiful." I winked at her and walked away with the biggest grin on my face. 

Bea POV 

It happened so quickly and before I knew it, I had her number and we were setting up to meet for coffee the following morning. I wish I could say seeing Allie upset me but it didn't, it excited me. Hearing her talk about how much she had thought about me feel something I couldn't describe. She seemed genuine, like she actually liked me which blew my mind because she was beautiful and amazing and I was just plain old me. 

While I was cooking I couldn't stop thinking of the spark I felt when she put her hand on top of mine and squeezed it. But as the day carried on I started to realize how stupid this all was, I was getting excited for someone I could never be with. Allie was hot, younger than me, and a stripper. 

I'd look like an idiot with someone like her, and maybe this was really just a game to her. I could hear Harry's voice telling me how useless I was and how no one else would ever want me. Maybe he was right and Allie was just having a bit of fun at my expense. 

Debbie didn't want to wait for her dad so she ate and I ate with her. When Harry got home I asked if he was hungry to which he responded, "what do you think?"

He went to go change his clothing and I warmed up his food. I set a plate in front of him and went to the bedroom while he ate watching some tv. 

I felt my phone vibrate and checked, it was a text from Allie. ~It was great seeing you Bea, can't wait for tomorrow morning. Definitely going to start my morning off right~

I slightly smiled but didn't answer. I deleted the message just in case and went to bed. Harry didn't bug me today, no hitting or touching and he actually didn't really talk to me which I was fine with. I'd rather that than anything else. As I fell asleep, I closed my eyes thinking of Allie.


	3. Chances

Allie POV 

I woke up earlier than I needed to, earlier than I generally would, just so I would be ready and on time to see Bea. After she suggested a coffee place and a time I knew I needed to get there no matter what. I'd have to take the bus to get there and I was probably going to be early but better that than being late. 

I put on some jeans and a low cute blouse. I tried to avoid wearing makeup when I wasn't working but I touched up a bit. I felt nervous even though I said this wasn't a date, I felt like it was. I knew that Bea was probably right, the kiss was a slip up but as selfish as it was, I didn't want to let this go. The husband bit didn't bother me because whenever she spoke about him it was never with elation or joy. Debbie, her daughter, on the other hand she seemed to really love. Her face lit up when I asked her age yesterday which told me that her daughter was important to her. 

I never had a great relationship with my parents or my older brother. I left home as soon as I could and did everything I could to make it on my own. I had friends I could fall back on from time to time but it was mostly me. 

I checked the time and decided I should start going now, I didn't mind getting there before she did. Gave me time to ease my nerves and compose myself. 

Bea POV 

I didn't have my first appointment until 1:30 which is why I had told Allie I could meet her for coffee at 10. I tried to act like nothing was different, today was just like any ordinary day but it wasn't. I was going to be seeing Allie and it made me nervous. Harry usually left at 9am and I followed shortly after taking Deb to school. 

He did comment on the fact that I was up earlier than usual. I told him I couldn't go back to sleep and he didn't ask any more questions. Once Harry had gone Debbie was getting ready to go and I took a moment to take into account my appearance. I was wearing jeans and a normal shirt with a cardigan. The slight bruise on my neck had gone, the only ones left were the ones on my arms. Harry was really heavy handed, he always left bruises if he had his hands on me for too long. 

I added some lipstick and clipped some of my hair back. I felt ridiculous trying to fix the way I looked for a simple coffee date. Not a date, coffee meet up. Debbie told me she was ready and I drove her to school. She said she liked my lipstick and that I looked nice. I told her to have a good day and that I loved her to the moon and back. 

It was getting closer to the time I was meant to meet Allie and I found that I couldn't stop smiling thinking about seeing her again. I parked outside of the cafe and saw she was already inside. I looked myself quickly in the mirror and then went in. She saw me walk in and smiled immediately, "Hey."

I walked over to her and she slightly hugged me. "Hi." I answered back. 

Someone came to take our orders and I felt her watching me when I was talking to the waitress. I looked back at her after the girl had gone, "What?"

"Nothing, you're just really beautiful."

I blushed, "Allie."

"What? It's the truth. So Bea the red head."

I gave her a funny look.

"You never gave me your last name so I had to improvise."

I laughed, "Smith. My name is Bea Smith."

"Well Bea Smith, I'm Allie Novak."

Our drinks and pastries were given to us and Allie looked at me, "So, tell me everything."

I shrugged, "Not much to say. I'm married, have the most amazing daughter who grew up too fast. I'm a hairdresser and live a really boring conventional life."

"I don't know about boring. Being a mother makes you pretty awesome in my book. And a hairdresser, I could never. I've struggled what to do with this mess on my head for years."

"It looks good, I like the color. Although I'd reckon you'd look better lighter."

"Ya reckon?" She asked looking down at her hair. 

"Yeah, I could do it for you sometime. Give you a cut and color."

"Well would you look at that. I thought I'd have trouble setting up the second date but it turns out it wasn't that hard."

I rolled my eyes, "Shut up. But really, I'd love to do it for you. You can come by my salon anytime and I can get it done."

"Hold on, your salon?"

"I co-own a salon with my best friend Maxine. She was one of the women you met on Friday night. I do more of the hair and she does makeup and nails but helps with the hair aspect too."

"And you said your life was boring, you own a salon."

"It's small, it's nothing really."

"Don't do that, don't undersell yourself. I wish I had something like that, something I owned and loved to do."

"What, you don't love what you do now?"

She slightly shrugged, "It pays the bills but it's not necessarily an honorable position."

"So what do you want to do?"

"I haven't got a clue. I'm not good at anything and I can't see myself really doing anything other than what I do now. I'm pretty good at making drinks when I'm not working the floor but even then I'd probably fuck that up to if I decided to become a bartender."

"You can't know until you try. You can start by putting resumes out at different bars."

"Yeah and what do I put for previous job description, whore?"

"Do you see what you do as whoring yourself out?" I asked honestly.

"Sometimes. I'm getting paid to undress myself in front of strangers. I've never slept with any of them but I've done other things. It all starts to feel like the same after a while."

"You shouldn't do it anymore if you don't want to."

"I wish it was that easy. I'm alone, I don't have anyone so I can't really depend on anyone to help me out if I decide to quit. My best friend has helped me enough and I always feel like a burden to her. If I do leave it has to be planned and when I'm ready financially and have enough stability."

I nodded, "Seems smart. Can I ask you something?"

She sighed and nodded. 

"How old are you?"

She didn't seem to think that's what I was going to ask and seemed relieved, "Bea, you aren't supposed to ask a lady her age."

"Come on."

"28."

"Jesus, you're so young."

"Barely, how old are you?"

I bit my lip, "34."

"You look younger, and 28 isn't that far from 34."

"Sure."

"Kinda thought you were going to ask me something else if I'm being honest."

"Like what?"

"Why I became a stripper."

"None of my business. You don't have to tell me. You seem to be doing what you need to do to survive, makes you braver than a lot of people. I could never judge you for what you do."

"Thank you, really. So when do I get to be touched by those magical hands."

I blushed and understood she meant the cut and color, "when do you want to come over? I know you work."

"I don't work Sundays or Mondays, I can come over later today if you have the availability."

"Sure, I can take you now before my appointment at 1:30 or later on towards closing."

"Closing please, I just-this isn't about you I just get nervous when people know what I do for a living. Maxine having seen it and working with you I'd feel weird if I showed up ya know?"

I understood immediately, "Look we generally close at 5:30 but I do make accommodations for some clients after. I can make sure Maxine is gone by then and you can come in at 6?"

She put her hands on top of mine, "Thank you Bea, you're a lifesaver."

I smiled, "no worries. I should get going, do you need a ride somewhere?"

"No, I'm okay really. You go ahead. I'll see you later yeah?"

We hugged again and I drove to the salon. Maxine smiled when she saw me, "Hey Bea. You look nice."

"Deb said that too, now I'm starting to wonder how crappy I look on a daily basis."

Maxine rolled her eyes and I started to get my station ready. 

Allie POV 

I took the bus back home and thought about Bea and our conversation. I absorbed everything she told me about herself. Even though the details were small I never wanted to forget a single one. When she offered to do my hair I don't think I hid my happiness, this time she was suggesting for us to see each other again. 

She sent me the address at some point and I had to map out which busses I had to take to get there. I appreciated her being so understanding about me not wanting to go to the salon during regular business hours. 

I never saw any clients outside of the club, other than Bea of course. On the rare occasion I stumbled upon someone who saw me dance and I saw them in the real world, it always embarrassed me. I always felt confident as 'Alliecat' but as regular Allie Novak I didn't feel sexy or like a bad bitch. I kept to myself. I never had a big group of friends other than Kaz and some people here and there. 

I've been single for a year and hated coming home alone. This minimal interaction I've had with Bea threw me off my routine. I was so used to being coped up in my apartment that I rarely went out unless Kaz forced me out. 

I felt anxious waiting for time to go by faster. The bus dropped me off nearby and I walked around the area. It was nice and calm, I could see Bea's salon from where I was. I saw the time on my watch go to 6 and I walked over, knocked on the door. Bea opened it and smiled when she saw me, "hey."

"Hi." I followed her inside.

Bea POV 

I had texted Deb I wasn't coming home until later, new client. I told her there were still leftovers from yesterday and if she could tell her dad. It wasn't uncommon for me to stay a little later if I had someone who couldn't come in during regular business hours. 

Harry would bitch about it but didn't ever do anything about it. I led Allie to my station and I ran my fingers through her hair to see how long I should cut it, "How long do you want it."

"You're the expert, I trust you."

We talked while I dyed her hair and I could feel her looking at me through the mirror. The entire time we talked she was looking at me. When I put the timer for how long the dye should be in her hair we just talked about movies and shows we liked, we liked a lot of the same things. 

Once the timer went off I went to wash her hair and I swear I heard her moan when I massaged her scalp. It threw me off but she didn't seem to notice she had done it so I didn't mention it. As I walked her back to my chair I cut her hair so it was more shoulder length and I styled it the way I thought she'd best fit it. 

I turned her around so I could make sure it looked good from the front and we made eye contact. I nervously smiled and Allie had this smirk on her face. I removed the cape and told her she could look. 

"Bea, this is amazing."

"Had a great canvass to work off of." 

"You really have talent, I've never known what to do with my hair. Thank you."

"Anytime." She was standing against the counter of my work area and I was standing in front of her. Nothing was said, we just looked at each other, you could hear a pin drop. 

"You really are amazing you know that."

I rolled my eyes, "I'm not."

"Yeah you are, amazing, beautiful, stunning." She pulled me towards her and kissed me. I kissed her back immediately and dropped the towel I had in my hand. I ran my fingers through her hair and pulled her to me. I needed more. She bit my bottom lip and pulled at it as she looked me in my eyes.   
"I don't want to be just friends."

I felt my heart race and this burning inside of me. I couldn't answer, I didn't have an answer. Instead I grabbed her and pulled her to kiss me again. She moaned when I put my tongue in her mouth. She pushed me so I was sitting on the chair she had just been sitting on. She moved to kiss my neck and sucked lightly, she stopped before she could make any marks. She kissed down my neck and towards my chest. I should have stopped her but I felt like I was losing control. 

She lightly pressed against my breast and I moaned at the contact. She pushed my cardigan off of me and continued to kiss me. When she put her hands on my arms I winced. She looked down and saw my arms covered in bruises. 

"Bea."

I pushed her off and put the sweater back on, "this was a mistake. I can't keep doing this, you should go." 

"Bea, what happened to your arms."

"I fell." I said instinctively. 

"Bea, those don't look like bruises from a fall they look like-"

"You should go. I have to get home and close up and it's getting late. I started to clean up and hoped she would just leave."

"I'm not going anywhere, look at me." She grabbed my hands and forced me to look at her, "what happened?" She seemed concerned, worried. 

"Nothing, it was an accident. Allie, just let it go. Forget about all of this."

"I can't do that. Please." She started to take my cardigan off again and looked at my arms, "Bea, someone did this."

I felt tears forming and she hugged me. I let myself cry into her chest as she kissed the top of my head. 

"I can't do this Allie. I need to get home. This should have never happened." I wiped my face and moved myself away from her. 

"I'm not walking away, let me help you. Who was it? Harry?"

I sighed, "He just gets frustrated."

"That doesn't give him the right to hurt you Bea."

"It's nothing I can't handle. This wasn't that bad."

"So there's been worse."

I shrugged, "He just got upset at something Boomer said at Franky's wedding and he went off."

"Does anyone know?"

"A close friend of mine and now you."

"You need to leave him."

"I can't do that."

"Yes you can, living in an environment like that isn't good, for you or for Debbie."

"He has never touched Debbie."

"Can you be so sure he never will?"

I thought about it and couldn't say for certain yes or no. "Allie, please just go. I'm asking, please. Whatever this was, whatever you and I had, it's done." I walked to the back room and started to wash the towels and cape she had used. I didn't hear the door but I assumed she had gone. When I turned around she was standing at the doorway. "You really have trouble listening."

"Yeah I'm the worst." She came over to me and put her hands on the side of my face. She looked me in my eyes, "do you really want this to be over?"

I don't know why I trusted her, why I wanted her around. "I don't even know what this is."

She outlined my bottom lip with her thumb, "Neither do I, but I know I haven't stopped thinking about you since the moment I met you and I know you feel the same way." She lightly brushed her lips on top of mine and I felt myself relax in her touch. 

"I can't do this here or today. I have to go home."

"Then when, where. I'll meet you anywhere, anytime. You decide."

I heard my phone start to ring. I ran out to go get it and saw Harry calling, "Yeah."

"Where the hell are you?"

"I'm at work, I told Deb to tell you I was going to be late. New client."

"Hurry up and get your ass over here, now!" He hung up and I closed my eyes. I sighed and turned around to see Allie with a worried look on her face. "I really need to go."

"Don't. I could hear him, he sounded angry. Bea, you can leave him." 

"I'm not leaving my daughter. I know you don't understand but she means the world to me. There is no line I wouldn't cross to be with her or protect her. If that means taking a hit here or there then I will. You don't know Harry, he has warned me about trying to leave. He will do everything in his power to keep Deb. I can't lose her, she's all I got."

She grabbed her stuff and walked over to me. She intertwined her hand with mine, "You're a good parent, but that shouldn't come at a price." She kissed me one last time. "I meant it, anywhere anytime, you call me and I'll be there. I'm not letting you disappear from me and I am not going anywhere. I can help you if you let me."

Allie POV 

Everything changed so quickly. We were talking, I was flirting here and there which made her blush and drove me insane. She did an amazing job on my hair and when I kissed her again it felt like I was brought back to that night. Her lips on mine. When I told her I didn't want to be just friends I was ready for rejection. Her bringing her lips to mine gave me some assurance she wanted more too. I smiled against the kiss and pushing her in the chair to get more access and put my lips on her neck and top of her chest. 

Then it switched after I had removed her sweater. I hadn't thought of much other than me wanting to touch her. I put my hands on her arms and she flinched like she was in pain. When I looked down and saw her arms covered in purple bruises I knew something was wrong. 

She tried pushing herself away from me and I could see the fear in her eyes. That husband that I was so jealous of was a man who put his hands on his wife. It made my blood boil hearing him talk to her on the phone and I knew she didn't want to go back to him. 

I wanted to help her I just didn't know how. I meant what I said, I wasn't going to walk away, I was going to be there, I was going to help her. 

Bea POV 

When I got home Harry started to raise his voice as to why I wasn't home. I explained to him that I had a new client that couldn't come in during regular hours. He bitched about me being useless and that the salon was a waste. 

"Harry please, lower your voice, Deb will hear."

"Hear what, that her mother is a pathetic excuse of a woman who can't even come home on time." He pulled me by my hair and harshly whispered in my ear, "Don't ever come home late again without my fucking permission." He roughly let go and he went to the bedroom. 

I put my face in my hands and rubbed my neck. Deb came out of her bedroom with her earphones in, "hey mum."

"Hi sweetheart."

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I just have a headache." I heard my phone start to buzz and went to go check it. It was Allie. I answered, "Hey Maxine what's up?"

"Bea? Are you alright, is someone there?"

"Yeah, closing up was fine." Debbie went back to her room. I lowered my voice, "Sorry, Deb was in the room."

"What about Harry?"

"He's watching tv in the bedroom."

"Are you okay?"

"Nothing different than any other night. He said I couldn't be late without his permission and he pulled my hair a bit."

I heard her sigh on the other end, "Bea-"

"I know what you're going to say, I know. I just can't okay?"

"I want to see you again."

"I don't know how, you work late nights I work in the day."

"We can work something out, but I need to see you again. I called you because I'm worried about you. I care about you Bea."

I smiled slightly, "I want to see you again too."

I could tell she was grinning, "I knew it."

"Look, let me think and I'll text you tomorrow. I promise."

"Okay, I'll be waiting for it. Goodnight Bea, and if you need anything, please call."

"Goodnight Allie." I hung up and smiled thinking of what Allie had said earlier today and just now. She wasn't giving up on me, and I didn't want her to.


	4. Performance

Allie POV 

The past couple days had been absolute torture. I hadn't seen Bea since Monday and it was already Friday night. We talked on the phone and texted but it wasn't the same. I missed her, I missed seeing her. 

She would say things were fine at home but I didn't believe her. Our schedules were completely opposite and it made it difficult to even plan when to meet. I thought about her all the time, I missed her like crazy. 

It had now been a week since I had met Bea and I could never have imagined that I would be this interested in someone the way I was into her. As I got ready to perform all I could think about was Bea. Her smile, her lips, her touch. I got called onto the stage and started to dance around the pole. As I turned to face the entire club I saw her sitting in the same place she was sitting exactly a week ago and it felt unreal, like a flashback but it was very real. Bea was here in front of me. 

Bea POV 

I really missed seeing Allie, even though she and I had only seen each other a handful of times, I just missed her. We would text but we both knew it wasn't the same. 

Harry had been working late so he hadn't had the energy to take his anger out on me until Friday. Deb had gone to a sleepover and wouldn't be back till Saturday mid-day. Times like that were dangerous, part of me always wanted to tell her no because she was my shield. He wouldn't be as bad if she was around from fear of her seeing or hearing. 

But I didn't want to stop her from having fun and having a life just because I didn't have one. He came home around 6 and I could feel his bad mood the second he walked in. He kicked his shoes off and grabbed a beer from the fridge. He told me to make him a sandwich and while I was I could feel the anger radiating off of him. 

I set the plate in from of him, apparently I wasn't fast enough because he said, "When I tell you to do something I expect you to do it. Does it look like I want to wait for you to do something as simple as make me a fucking sandwich."

I flinched as he got up and I slowly moved away from him. He grabbed my left arm roughly and forced me to look at him, "You are fucking useless. You're no good for anything." He shoved me against the wall and slapped me. I could feel ringing in my ear and he pushed me up against the wall choking me. 

I tried to move his hands and clawed at him but he kept squeezing. He let go and I fell to the ground coughing. He kicked me 3 times and all I could feel was pain all over. He lifted me up again and slapped me once more. He called me every name in the book then grabbed his coat, put his shoes on and left. 

I took sharp intakes of breath and slowly got up. I walked to the bathroom and looked myself in the mirror. I had bruising on my cheek and a split lip. I removed my shirt and felt my ribs, they didn't feel broken, maybe a bit bruised. He grabbed my arm really roughly so I was sure that would bruise and my neck was definitely going to show in the morning. 

I had to think of an excuse, I could cover my neck and arms but the face. Makeup would cover the bruising on my cheek but not my lip. He never thought of any of this, how hard it was to keep making excuses that I'm not sure people always believed. What was I going to tell Deb? She probably thought I was the clumsiest person in the world from all the lies I've told her of me falling, hitting myself with the kitchen cabinets, bumping into things. 

I was angry and frustrated and started to cry. I hated my life, I don't know how things got this bad. It started out of nowhere, he and I were arguing about something and he back handed me. He was so apologetic and probably bought me every flower in the world to say he was sorry. He told me it would never happen again and begged me not to leave him. I don't know when it got to this, him beating me without batting an eye. He stopped caring how hard he hit me, how much it hurt. 

I can't believe I let it get this far. You hear stories about women who get stuck in these relationships and you can never comprehend why they stay until you are in one. He was most likely going to go drinking and wouldn't be back until really late or not until the morning. I had no idea what or who he did when he didn't come home and I didn't care. If he slept with someone else at least he wouldn't try to sleep with me. 

I thought about Allie and how badly I wanted to see her. I needed to see her, and at this point, I didn't care about the cost. I put on a long sleeved shirt and a scarf. I didn't even try to cover the bruising on my face. The club was dark just like last time and I sat in the exact spot. I heard Allie's stage name get called and I watched her come out in an outfit that made my jaw drop. 

She looked amazing, beautiful. She turned to face my direction and she saw me. Her face lit up and she seemed to dance in a much more provocative way now that she knew I was in the audience. For a moment I forgot about the pain I was in and could only focus on her. 

After the song was over she practically ran over to me and pressed her lips onto mine. She cupped my cheek and I flinched and she immediately stopped. She grabbed my hand and led me closer to the bar where there was more light. She saw my face and gasped, "Bea."

"It's nothing, I just really wanted to see you." I heard my voice break. 

She gave me a sad smile, "I really wanted to see you too. Come on." She grabbed my hand and led me to the back room. She sat me down on the couch and sat across from me holding my hands. "Bea what happened?" 

"He just got angry over nothing really. Deb isn't home and that's usually when things get a bit harder."

"Oh Bea." She squeezed my hand and cupped my other cheek. "You still look beautiful if that counts for anything."

I scoffed, "Yeah right."

"Hey, you do." She put a strand of hair behind my ear, "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." She lightly pressed her lips against mine and I pulled her into me. She put her hand on my thigh and continued to kiss me. When she moved slightly so she could be closer to me I slightly jumped at feeling her hand on my side. "There's more?"

I shrugged. "It's nothing Allie please."

She removed my scarf without letting me argue. "Oh my God." She tugged at my shirt, "take it off."

I took a deep breath and removed my shirt. I saw her eyes fill with sorrow, pity. Which is what I didn't want. "Don't do that."

"Do what?" She asked. 

"I don't want your pity."

"Bea, this isn't pity. I just can't believe it. My God." 

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize." She lightly gazed her finger on my arm. "Please let me help you."

"How?" I asked. "I can't leave him."

"What he is doing is wrong Bea. You could go to the police, an attorney. Get a divorce, get full custody of Debbie."

"Harry would murder me if he found out."

"No he won't, he can't do anything once it's been done."

"Allie you don't understand, he's tried."

She stayed quiet and looked at me, "He what?"

"I called the cops once. I dialed triple 0. They showed up and he answered the door and he sent them away. And then he-" I started to cry and feel my hands shake. She put her hands on top of mine. "Debbie was away at summer camp so there was nothing holding him back. He broke my arm, 2 of my ribs, partially punctured my lung. I had bruises on my face, stomach, arms. I went to the hospital, I had to. The doctors and nurses knew that I didn't fall down the stairs, and that my husband was a bit too worried for me to be left alone with anyone. They tried to help me but Harry kept telling me that if I said anything he would take Deb. My daughter is all I have Allie, I can't. I can't just leave no matter how badly I want to. I hate my marriage, I hate him, I hate my life."

"What did your friends say? When the found out."

"Well, I couldn't use the stairs as an excuse because we don't have stairs. I called Maxine and told her I had been in a car accident and if she could watch the salon for me. I made every excuse for her and the girls not to come visit me. Liz helped by saying I needed rest and that they could come see me after I came home. You don't know how many times I wished they wouldn't have been so quick to believe me."

Allie hugged and held me as I cried. She kissed my tears and looked at me, "I'm gonna help you. I don't know how, but I am. I promise you, I'm going to get you out." She kissed me and I kissed her with all the power and fire I had for her. 

I looked down at her, her outfit, "You know, you took my breath away when you stepped out on the stage."

She smiled, "Yeah?"

I nodded, "You looked really sexy."

She pulled me into another kiss and she moved so she was straddling me. She made sure she wasn't hurting me and kissed me again. I placed my hands on her hips and kissed her neck, down her chest, and in between her breasts. I didn't exactly know what I was doing, but I didn't want to stop. 

She nipped at my ear and whispered, "I've missed you so fucking much. You have no idea what you do to me Bea."

I lightly laughed, "I think I do, because you do the same things to me."

She kissed me and grinded against me a bit and threw her head back so I could get a better view of her breasts. I moved my hands to cup her ass and she moaned in my mouth. I liked feeling her in my hands. Hearing her moans and whimpers did something to me that I couldn't really explain. 

We were interrupted by a voice outside, "Al, your time is up! I need the room."

"Fucks sake." Allie mumbled. "I'll be right out!" She looked back at me, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, you have to work. I've distracted you enough."

"You're a good kind of distraction. Please let me know when you get home. Be careful. And, I meant what I said. I am going to get you out." She kissed me.

"Okay." I put my shirt and scarf back on and was about to leave the room. I looked back at her, "Wait shouldn't I pay you or something?"

"No."

"They think you were in here with a client, don't you have to take some money back to them?"

"Don't worry about it, I got it." She winked at me and I walked out. I drove home to an empty house but feeling fuller than I've felt in a long time. 

Allie POV 

It was amazing seeing Bea, it was under pretty unfortunate circumstances but at least we both got to see each other even if it was for a couple of moments. 

I hated Harry Smith, I fucking hated him. I meant what I said to Bea, I was going to get her out no matter what it took. I knew I couldn't do it alone, I mean I'm not really someone with that kind of power, but I knew people who had it. 

I didn't get off of work until almost 3am. Bea had texted me a couple of hours prior telling me she had gotten home and that he wasn't there. I felt relief knowing that nothing was waiting for her when she got back home. I know coming to see me was a big bloody risk. 

I went home and couldn't sleep. I was laying in bed looking up at the ceiling feeling fucking useless. Bea was this beautiful human being enduring things no one should have to because she loved her daughter and was afraid to leave. 

At some point I did close my eyes but I only slept for a couple of hours. I woke up at 7am and didn't feel like staying in bed. If I was going to do anything to help Bea, I was going to start now. I took a shower, made sure I looked pretty decent and ordered a Lyft. I could take busses where I was going but it would take too long. When I got picked up the driver was one of the quite ones which I loved. I put my earphones in and listened to my music. 

When he arrived at my destination I thanked him for the ride and walked up to the front door. I knocked and waited. It was a little after 8, so she should be up. The door swung open and I was faced with my best friend. "Allie." She smiled and opened her arms. 

I hugged her back, "Hey Kaz. I need you help."

Bea POV 

Allie had texted me good morning and that she was going to run some errands but that I could call her no matter what. I smiled at the sentiment and texted her back good morning and that I appreciated it. 

As I got ready for work I tried to think of an excuse I could use for the lip. I was going to wear a scarf to work even though it was pretty warm with a long sleeve. I was able to cover up the bruise on my cheek with makeup but the busted lip was harder to conceal. The pain in my stomach I could work through, I've been able to get by with worse and no one really noticed. 

I was grabbing my things to go to work when Harry walked in. I didn't even look up, "I'm going to work. Deb comes home later, I'll cook when I get back."

"We could order in if you want."

It was his way of making amends. His way of saying sorry by taking something off my plate that he usually expected me to do. I nodded, "Fine." I walked out the door and drove to work. When I got there I said good morning to everyone with a smile on my face. 

As I put my things down Maxine came over to ask me something. "Hey love, I needed to ask about the last shipment we got of-Oh my God Bea, your lip."

"Ugh, you won't believe it. I was such an idiot. I got a package in the mail and they tape those things so fucking shut I was pulling at it and back handed myself trying to open it. I had some of my rings on and it did more damage. But it's all good."

"God that must have hurt."

"You have no idea." I said thinking about last night and how it really happened. "So, what about that last shipment?"

Allie POV 

Kaz had led me inside to her home and offered me some breakfast and coffee. I thanked her and she sat down with me at the table, "So, long time no see. Thought you had forgotten about me."

I bit my lip, "Kaz, I'm sorry. It's just I work almost every night and when I'm not working I'm sleeping."

"But this is a bit early even for you. Did you work last night?"

I nodded, "I couldn't sleep, and I need your help with something."

"You need money?"

"No, I'm okay. I'm doing alright at the club. Plus, I've already taken enough from you."

"Hey, you didn't take anything. I wanted you to have it. But if that's not it then what is it?"

"I met someone, someone really special but she's in a situation."

"What kind of situation?"

"She's married-"

"Oh Allie, come on. You can't be serious, you're sleeping with a married woman."

"We haven't slept together yet, just kissed that's all. And that's not really the situation."

"What's worse than her being married?"

"Her husband hits her, he's abusive Kaz. She came to visit me at the club last night and he did a number on her."

Kaz sighed and mumbled the word, "Jesus." She looked at me, "So not only is she married, and straight, but she's in an abusive relationship with her husband. You really know how to pick them."

"I need to get her out Kaz."

"Does she want to get out."

"Yes, but he won't let her." I bit my lip, "She has a daughter and he's threatened to take her if Bea leaves and he's also threatened to kill Bea. From what she's told me, he's come close to it."

"Fucks sake. I thought this couldn't get any worse. Now there's a kid involved. But Allie, what exactly do you think I can do for her? I'm a nurse not a superhero I can't exactly fight him off and take her and the kid and run."

"No, but you're married to a man who can."

Kaz seemed to understand, "Allie, Will can't just pop over show his badge and take her and the kid. There are protocols. If Bea doesn't want to leave, he cannot force her. And unless she makes a complaint, he cannot make any arrests."

"But, maybe if he goes to talk to her, tell her her options, she'll be more inclined to leave."

Kaz sighed, "I need to talk to him about it. I'm not making any promises."

I got up and hugged her, "Thank you, thank you."

"You really this girl don't you?"

"She's amazing Kaz. She's so beautiful and caring. The moment I met her I couldn't stop thinking about her. You'd love her Kaz."

"If she makes you light up the way you just did just by talking about her, she must be special."

Bea POV 

I was sweeping up the floor when I heard the bell ring to the front of the store. I heard Maxine say hello followed by Liz's voice. I looked over at her and smiled. She came over to hug me when she saw my lip, "Oh Bea."

I shook my head. I told Maxine that Liz and I were going to have a cuppa in the back room and she said alright. Liz followed me to the back and I closed the door and sat down. I groaned when I did and Liz sat across from me, "What happened this time."

"Took too long to make his food."

"Bea this is getting ridiculous. There are bruises elsewhere aren't there? That's why you're covered up."

I nodded.

"What did you tell Debbie, Maxine?"

"Debbie wasn't home, she gets home today. And I'll tell her the same bullshit excuse I told Maxine. I hit myself opening a box."

Liz seemed shocked, "And Maxine bought that?"

"She didn't question it and seemed to go along with it in a way that made me think she believed me."

"Bea, you can't keep doing this anymore. You need to leave him."

"I know, I want to Liz I really do. But I don't know where to start. And if he finds out that I'm planning on leaving, he'll take Deb and kill me. He thinks I belong to him." I felt tears well up and I pushed them down. I didn't want to ruin my makeup. 

Liz came over to hug me, "The only person you belong to is yourself love." 

After the day basically ended I locked up and went home. I could hear Debbie's laugh and a smile formed on my face. I opened the door and she ran over to me. She hugged me tightly and I tried not to make a sound. Harry was looking at me worried I'd fuck up. "Hi sweetheart." 

She let go, thankfully, "Hey mum. Woah, what happened to your lip?"

I rolled my eyes, "You'll never believe it. I was opening a package and instead of using knife I pulled at it and hit myself in the face. What an idiot right?" I could see Harry look at Deb to see if she would believe that lame excuse. 

"Jesus Mom, how hard did you hit yourself?"

"Didn't you know, I have superhero strength?" I winked at her. 

She scoffed, "Yeah right. So what are we eating?"

Harry interrupted, "I thought we could order in, you go ahead and pick Deb."

Debbie smiled and went to go grab her phone from her room. I let go of the groan I was letting in and I put my hand on my side. Before I went to the bedroom I stopped in from of Harry, "Do me a favor. Next time be careful with the face, it's harder to cover up and I'm running out of excuses."

He clenched his jaw, "It was an accident."

"Which part? Slapping my face, busting my lips, chocking me, or kicking me in the stomach? I'm tired of people thinking I'm an idiot because you can't control your temper."

"Oi watch it."

"Or what, you'll throw me down and hit me again. The least you could do is help me with an excuse, people are going to start noticing Harry." I went to the bedroom and got changed. I didn't confront him every time it happened but it got harder to hold in my frustrations. 

I was so caught up in warning Harry about being more careful, I didn't realize Debbie had heard the whole thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, so ignore the note under this one, it's from the first chapter but I'm not sure why it attached to this chapter. But anyway, how about that cliffhanger?


	5. No More Hiding

Debbie POV 

For as long as I've grown up, I've always believed that I had a good life. Not perfect, no one has a perfect life, but good. My parents were together, the seemed to care for each other and they loved me. I always heard stories of kids who's parents had messy divorces and worse custody battles and I was always so grateful that I had two parents who were happy and together, or so I thought. 

As I think back at it, I never actually saw my parents be overly affectionate other than my dad having his arm around my mom from time to time they rarely kissed in from of me. They fought sure, but so do all parents. Other than that, everything was fine. Dad always treated me like a princess and mom always made me feel like I was special. 

They loved me unconditionally and I felt lucky to have the life I did. When coming back from my friends sleepover, dad was waiting for me in the living room. He cracked jokes with me and never failed to make me laugh. I went to my room to go charge my phone and he and I talked in the living room waiting for mom to come home. 

When she did I ran over to her and hugged her. She and I were always pretty affectionate with each other even though she never seemed to be with dad. As she told me about what happened to her lip I quickly believed her, why did I believe her? When dad told me to go pick out what I wanted to eat I went back to my room to grab my phone. I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I was always taught never to do that but hearing their voices and really listening to what mom was saying made time stand still. 

It couldn't be true, no, it wasn't. I sat on my bed thinking about the excuse she just told me about how she hurt herself and I thought of the millions of times she hurt herself and I would come home to see her with a black eye or in pain somewhere. He didn't deny it when she told him to be more careful, which could only mean one thing. I felt sick to my stomach and part of me didn't want to believe it. She was always wearing long sleeves, sweaters, turtlenecks, scarfs and I never saw it. How blind could I have been?

I thought I had this great life but it was just a facade. If my dad was hitting my mom, why was she covering for him. Why was he doing this in the first place. I felt myself get angry but I didn't know who I was angry at. 

I heard a knock on my door and looked up to see my mom, "Hey sweetheart, did you decide?"

I looked at her looking for something different, looking for something to tell me the pain she was hiding. I shook my head, "Not yet. Maybe you guys should decide."

"Okay, are you alright?"

I nodded slowly, "I'm okay. You and dad should decide."

"Okay." She left my room and I sat on my bed trying to figure out what the hell I should do.

Bea POV 

I told Harry to pick and I'd call. He decided on pizza and Deb came out of her room. She seemed off, like something changed when she went to her room. 

I was still on the phone with the pizza company when she came over to me and hugged me. Not as tight as before, thank God, but she put her arms around me and put her head on my chest. I looked down and kissed the top of her head, "What's this for?"

"I just love you mom."

I smiled, "I love you too baby." After I placed our order Debbie seemed to linger around me. Something was wrong, she usually lingered with her dad more and she seemed like she didn't want to leave me alone. 

I tried to clean up the kitchen a bit while we waited. Harry got up to get a beer and I dropped a towel. I went to go grab it but felt pain in my ribs. He quickly picked it up and handed it to me but never looked me in my eyes. 

I felt my phone buzz and saw the Allie was texting me. She said she was going into work and that she'd be thinking of me. The doorbell rang and Harry got up to go get it. We all sat down to eat and I slowly sat down and did my best not to make a sound. Debbie was unusually quiet today and I didn't like it. Something was wrong with her and I needed to find out what. 

Debbie POV 

I watched them while I was in the kitchen. Mom dropped a towel and she couldn't pick it up, like she was in some kind of pain. Dad picked it up but didn't say anything. If she was in pain in her stomach or something I started to feel bad. I had hugged her twice already and she was probably hurting and I didn't know. 

I watched as she slightly flinched when he passed her to go to the door. Something I probably wouldn't have paid much attention to before but now, it was like I had blinders on. Was it like this all the time and I never saw it?

She looked like she was in pain when she sat down to eat and afterwards I saw her take two aspirins. I wanted to talk to her, alone, but I didn't want dad to catch us. I needed to know what was going on. I helped mom clean up a bit and I looked over at her, "Mom, could you and I have like a girls day tomorrow?"

She seemed surprised, "Sure. What do you want to do?"

"Maybe we could go for brunch or something by the pier and walk around."

"Yeah, okay. I'd like that."

"Like what?" I heard my dad's voice ask and I saw her eyes cloud with fear. 

I turned around to face him, "Mom and I are having a girls day tomorrow."

He looked at her for a moment and quickly smiled, "That's great Deb. Don't have too much fun without me?" He kissed the top of my head and it took every restraint inside of me not to push him off. 

He went to his bedroom and I saw mom start to relax again. When I heard the tv in his room turn on and the volume go up I looked at her, "Can I hug you?"

"Of course you can, you know you don't have to ask."

"I just don't want to hurt you, like I'm sure I did earlier when I first saw you."

Her face went through a range of emotions in seconds. Surprise, questioning, sadness, and fear. "What are you talking about?"

"Mom, I know."

She shook her head and bit her lip, "No Deb, no." She looked to make sure the door of the bedroom was closed and faced away from me. "Deb, I think you're tired and you need to go to bed."

"Mom, please look at me."

She reluctantly turned around and I went over to hug her carefully so I didn't hurt her. She hugged me back and I could hear her start to slightly cry. She put her hands on my face, "Debbie I'm sorry."

"No, I am."

She looked around, "we can't talk about this here."

"Tomorrow." I stated. 

She nodded and kissed my forehead, "Go to bed."

"I won't fall asleep. I'll be awake so if anything happens-"

"No. Go to bed, close your eyes and go to sleep. Nothing will happen tonight." I felt my eyes fill with tears and she hugged me. "Go to bed sweetheart. Please, for me."

I nodded and I went o my bedroom and cried myself to sleep.

Bea POV 

I was shocked, truly. I never expected for this conversation to be started by Deb. Whenever I imagined it, I always saw it happening with me sitting her down and having to explain it to her. I didn't know how or when she found out. Has she always known and she just decided to say something now?

My mind was whirling and I needed to gather my thoughts. I texted Allie ~Debbie knows. I have no idea how she found out but she knows. We're going out to the pier tomorrow and we're going to talk about it~

I got a response seconds later ~Are you okay?~

~I don't know how I feel about it. Part of me is relieved she knows and the other part wishes she never had to find out. She's still a kid, she doesn't need to know about all of this.~

~It was bound to happen Bea. Just talk to her, maybe this is one step closer to getting you out of your marriage. Harry can't take Debbie from you if she wants to stay with you. If she knows the truth, she won't want to be with anyone but you.~

~I'm just nervous about tomorrow.~

~Don't be, it'll be fine. You're strong and amazing.~

I smiled and told Allie I was off to bed. I took a deep breath and went to the bedroom. Harry was watching tv and I went to the bathroom to put on pajamas. I got in bed and moved so I was facing away from him. 

"What are you guys going to do tomorrow?" Harry asked. 

"Deb wants to go to the pier."

"Hmm."

"It was her idea Harry."

He stayed quiet and I shut my eyes letting the exhaustion of the day takeover. I went to bed thinking about what I was going to tell Deb the next morning. 

Feeling the sun coming through the window woke me up. Harry wasn't in bed. I got up to go shower and let the water completely wake me. The heat felt good against my skin. I wrapped a towel around myself and looked at my phone. I texted Allie good morning and knew she probably wouldn't see it until a little while later because she worked late last night. 

I heard a knock at the door, "Deb?" I asked. 

"Yeah, can I come in? Dad's gone."

"Wait, hold on. I'm still not dressed." That wasn't why I didn't want her to come in, my bruises were visible. I started to rummage through my drawers trying to put something on quickly when she opened the door anyway. 

I had only managed to put some pants on and a sports bra. I was left exposed in a way I never wanted her to see me. I saw her look over my arms, my stomach, and the bruise on my face that had been covered by makeup yesterday. "I thought I raised you to have manners." I joked. I grabbed a sweatshirt put it one and sat down on the bed. "Come here." I patted the area next to me. 

She slowly walked over but sat farther from me, she seemed afraid to touch me. I sat closer to her and put my arm around her, "I won't break."

She hugged me and buried her face in my chest starting to cry.

"Debbie I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have found out, at least not without me telling you, preparing you." 

"I don't get it. I've been trying to understand when it started, how. How come I never saw it?"

"When did you figure it out?"

"Yesterday, I heard what you told dad."

I closed my eyes. "Debbie, I never meant for you to find out that way. I wanted to sit down and talk to you about it but it just seemed too hard. Baby, I'm sorry."

"Why are you still with him, if he hits-no, he does hit you. Why don't we leave?"

"I don't know where to go. And you don't know your dad, he'll move heaven and earth to find you and me. And when he does find me-it would make things worse."

"When did it start?"

I smiled at her, "Long time ago."

"No, I want to know. When?"

"You were about 5. We were fighting about something that didn't seem to even really matter but I raised my voice at him and he slapped me. It was a one off, he swore it would never happen again he was just frustrated at work and he took it out on me. I threatened to leave him and take you if it ever happened again. But then," I sighed, "it kept happening, all the time. And I didn't know who to turn to, who to tell. I always grew up with the idea that you stayed with your husband if he put his hands on you it's because it was something you did to upset him. I knew it wasn't right but I just got too afraid to leave him. And you loved him so much, I thought, as long as he never touched you then I could stick it out. But it's gotten worse and he's gotten more reckless. He used to be better at hitting me in places that I could easily cover but he either forgets or doesn't care."

"I should have noticed, why didn't I?"

"Because I didn't want you to. I didn't want to destroy the image you had of your dad because of something he and I were going through."

"I hate him."

"Debbie-"

"No I do. It's not right mom, he can't do this and get away with it. We have to go to the police we have to do something."

"Debbie, it's not that simple."

"Yes it is."

"Debbie I can't do it, I'm not strong enough." I felt myself overcome with emotion. "I can't do it. You have no idea how many times I have driven myself to the police station and I couldn't get out of the car. My hands felt like they were glued to the steering wheel. Instead I just drove to work or went back home. I can't do it, and I know it's pathetic but I can't. I'm scared of saying it out loud for the world to hear, I'm scared of what people will think of me, my friends, you. I'm scared of what Harry will do when he finds out." I cried into my hands and she wrapped her arms around me. 

"I'm sorry mom, I'm so sorry. I'll protect you, he'll never hit you again."

"Debbie it isn't you job to protect me, I'm the parent. I should be protecting you." I wiped my tears and looked at her, "I'm gonna do it. I don't know when or how I'll muster up the courage but I'll go to the police."

"And I'll be there with you."

"But Deb, I need you to pretend like you don't know. If he finds out you know, I don't know what he'll do but it won't be good."

She nodded, "Okay. But, you need to stop hiding it from me. I'm not a baby anymore, I can handle it."

"You're always gonna be my baby." I hugged her tightly. "So, you still want to go for that walk at the pier."

"I mentioned food too." She quickly added. 

I laughed, "of course you did."

Allie POV 

I woke up around noon and checked my phone. I had a bunch of texts from Bea. She texted me good morning, hoping I slept well. She said her and Debbie talked and it went better than she expected. She said they were going to the pier and that now that Debbie knew, she was going to make an effort to try to leave Harry. She also told me she missed me and wanted to see me.

I couldn't contain the smile on my face. This was fucking fantastic. Will and Kaz were supposed to be picking me up today so we could get some lunch and talk about Bea. This could be perfect, if Will was on board, we could get Bea to talk to the police and leave Harry. 

I showered, got dressed, and went downstairs when Kaz told me she was here. I got in the car and said hi to them both. I caught up quickly with Will and when we got to the restaurant he started to talk to me about Bea. "I looked her up, there is a filed case of a triple 0 call from her address and when an office went over, the husband said it was an accident and that nothing had happened. Some neighbors have made some noise complaints but nothing was ever done about those."

"And I spoke to some nurses at St. Vincents which is the closest hospital to their house and she's been brought in a handful of times with different injuries. One of the nurses who treated her flagged her file saying she had reason to believe the husband had something to do with it but because Bea never pressed any charges or said he did it, nothing could be done." Kaz added. 

I sighed, "What can we do? I don't want to get either of you in trouble but she needs to leave him. She told me this morning that she wants to go to the police she's just afraid he'll catch her."

Will seemed to think about it, "Maybe she doesn't have to go to the police, the police could go to her."

Bea POV 

Debbie and I ate and walked along the pier and I felt happier than I had felt in a long time. I was so afraid of the day I would tell her and how she would take it. Part of me thought she wouldn't have believed me because of how close she was to her dad. 

Instead she was supportive and wanted to be there for me no matter what decision I made. I needed to go to the police, go against him, I couldn't live like this anymore. I deserved more and so did Debbie. 

Allie had texted me telling me how proud she was of me and how much she wanted to see me too. I told her I had a free hour in my schedule tomorrow. I could meet her somewhere and we could have lunch or something. She agreed almost immediately and said she'd meet me there. 

When Debbie and I got home I started on a quick dinner. She was doing a puzzle on the dining table when Harry got home. He set his clubs down and went to kiss Debbie's forehead, "How was the pier?"

"Good." She answered quickly. 

"That's good honey." He went to go get changed and I put dinner on the table. 

Debbie seemed to be doing the best she could not to make it seem like anything was different but I knew she was struggling. She was eating and cleared her throat a bit, "Mom, I was wondering if you could sleep in my room tonight."

I looked up at her and could feel Harry looking at me. "Why sweetheart? I thought sharing a bed with you parents was for babies." I joked hoping he wouldn't think anything of it. 

She rolled her eyes, "It is but-" she bit her lip a bit, "I had a bad dream last night and didn't sleep well. I was hoping you could be there, just in case I got another one." 

I knew she was trying to help me but part of me wondered if she was having nightmares because of what she found of yesterday. I put my hand on top of hers, "of course."

She smiled and looked at her father, "Don't be offended I didn't ask you. But I think your snoring would have kept me up half the night anyway."

He laughed a bit but I could feel his eyes piercing me. When I picked up dinner, Debbie went to the bathroom and Harry grabbed me by my hair, "Don't think of doing anything stupid." 

"What do you think I'm going to do. Spend all night telling her what you do to me. It'd take longer than a night to go through it all."

Her turned me around but kept his hand in my hair, "watch your mouth." 

I heard the water run and pushed him off while fixing my hair. He moved away from me and went to the bedroom closing the door. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. Debbie came out and saw me, "What's he done?"

"Nothing." I pulled her in for a hug, "thank you for the little excuse you used at the table. I think you just miss your mommy."

She rolled her eyes, "you caught me."

I smiled and she went to get ready for bed. I grabbed some things from my bedroom and could feel Harry's eyes on me, warning me. I got dressed for bed and I held Debbie as she fell asleep. I was going to get us both out, no matter what it took.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, again please disregard the note from below. I don't know why it's attached itself to every chapter but now I have to live with my choices. Next chapter will have more Ballie, promise.


	6. Love and Hate

Bea POV

I woke up in Deb's bed and looked over to see her still sleeping. Spending the night with her reminded me of her when she was a little girl and would climb into bed with me whenever it rained too hard or she had a bad dream. I kissed her forehead and got up to go shower. Harry was still sleeping so I took my time in the shower. I was thinking about my day and how I was going to be able to see Allie today. 

When I got out of the shower, Harry had started to wake. He barely mumbled a good morning and I went to wake Debbie up. I sat on her bed and kissed her forehead again, "Deb, it's time to get up. Come on." She groaned and I rubbed her back. "Come on, you have to get up to go to school. 

She yawned as she finally got up and made her way to the bathroom. I got started on breakfast which Harry basically swallowed and then he left. When Debbie got out of the shower she asked me what my plan was.

"I don't know yet, but whatever I do, I have to be careful. If I go to the police I have to make sure it's during the day and that I'm back home before your father suspects anything. If I do file charges or file for a divorce at least I need to find a place for you and me to go to. We can't stay here." 

"I know. We could find an apartment, just you and me. It'd be cool."

"I don't think I could be doing this without you."

She smiled and hugged me. When I took her to school I told her to have a good day and that I loved her to the moon and back. I got to the salon and Liz was there with Maxine. She had decided to stop by before she went to work. "Morning love, how are ya?"

"I'm good." I smiled. 

Liz came over to me, "You alright?"

"Deb knows. She found out and I'm gonna leave him. I'm gonna get out Liz."

"Oh Bea." She hugged me and I hugged her back. "You know you're going to have to tell them." She said talking about the rest of the girls. 

I nodded, "I know, but I'll do it when I'm ready. The person I'm most afraid of telling is Franky. You know how she is, she'll get angry that I didn't tell her."

"Yes but she'd also want to be there for you."

"I know, and I will tell her. I'll tell all of them when the time is right."

She silently congratulated me and I could feel Maxine looking at me. "What?" I asked.

"Is there something I should know about."

"Yes, but just give me some time and I'll tell you all about it." I couldn't hide it from her forever. 

"Okay." She dropped it and I saw my first client for the day walk in. 

Allie POV 

I got to the restaurant Bea and I had decided to meet at. It was nearby where I lived so I walked there. I couldn't wait to see her, she's the only thing that was ever on my mind. I saw her walk in and I felt myself smile immediately. I stood up and she walked over to me. "Hi."

"Hey." 

I hugged her and kissed her cheek. She turned her face slightly and we almost kissed but we both realized we were in public and awkwardly separated. I could see her start to blush and I smiled even harder. "Sorry, boundaries."

"No, I'm sorry I just got nervous." 

We sat down and ordered. I put my hand on top of hers, "So, how are you doing?"

"Surprisingly, really good. I'm glad she knows. I would have rathered if she had found out another way but it feels like one less thing I have to worry about."

"That's great Bea. And I've been thinking, I think I found a way for you to be able to file a police report or at least talk to a police officer without actually having to go to the station."

"How?"

"I have a friend whose a cop and I mentioned your situation to him. He's willing to go to your salon, pose as a customer and you two can talk. And maybe you could ask Maxine to cover for you while you two talk in private somewhere. Or, he could meet you at a cafe or something, whatever makes you feel more comfortable."

"Allie, you're doing so much for me. You didn't have to do that."

I squeezed her hand, "I wanted to. I told you, I'm getting you out."

"I think it would be safer to meet at the salon, but I'd have to tell Maxine. She'd question why a man was coming to talk to me privately. But if I tell Maxine, I have to tell Franky and ugh." She rubbed her forehead. 

"Why would telling Franky be a bad thing, she seems like a top chick."

"You don't know Franky. She hasn't always liked Harry but if she finds out I've been hiding this from her she's going to be angry at me and want to kill Harry."

"She's going to have to get in line, I'd like to have a go at him myself."

She smiled, "She gets back from her honey moon tonight. This is going to suck."

We set up for Will to come see her tomorrow because she had more availability. She said she would tell Maxine today and Franky tomorrow. She seemed to get nervous again thinking about it and I put my hand on her knee, "You are going to do amazing. I'm so proud of you."

She smiled and she bit her lip, "I've really missed you."

I leaned in and whispered in her ear, "I have too. I miss feeling your lips on mine, your hands on my body. I can still feel you."

Our lips were inches apart and I knew she wanted to but we were in public and she was still shy about it. Her phone rang and she jumped. She went to answer it and I smiled knowing that she wanted me too. She looked back at me, "My next appointment just cancelled. I have another free hour and a half."

I didn't even try to hide my smile, "Now what are we going to do with all that free time."

She jokingly shrugged, "We shouldn't let it go to waste."

"Nope." We ate but the last thing on my mind was food. I wanted to be alone with her without the time limit that we had in the back rooms or the fear of someone possibly seeing us. 

She seemed to read my mind because she put her hand on top of mine, "Get me out of here."

I didn't need to be told twice. I asked for the bill and I paid. I followed her to her car and I gave her directions to my place. I grabbed her hand and took her up to my apartment. 

Bea POV 

I don't know what took over me but I knew I wanted to be alone with Allie. I'm not necessarily sure what that would entail but I just wanted to feel her again. As soon as she brought me inside to her apartment, I only had a moment to look around because in seconds she had me pressed up against the door with her lips on mine. I moaned the second her tongue entered my mouth and I pulled her jacket off of her. I put my fingers in the loops of her jeans and brought her closer to me. 

I could feel her smiling into the kiss. We separated to get some air and she put her hand on the side of my neck, "I will never get tired of doing that."

"Prove it."

She brought me toward the couch and sat me down. She straddled me and quickly removed the scarf I had on. She raked her teeth along my neck and I closed my eyes feeling her lips on my neck and jaw. She kissed me again and we spent so long just in each others embrace kissing each other. I never enjoyed kissing, but with Allie I couldn't get enough. Whenever we separated, even if it was for a couple of seconds, I missed her. 

I took a moment to outline her lips with my fingers and I made sure I memorized every feature. She was so beautiful and it shocked me that she wanted to be with someone like me. I brought her lips to mine and I moved my lips to suck on her pulse point. She grinded against me a little harder and I could hear her breathing get a bit labored. I sucked on her neck leaving light marks on her skin. 

She put her hands on the sides of my face, "we should stop before I can't control myself."

"What if I don't want you to control yourself?"

She kissed me deeply and tugged at my bottom lip, "God what are you doing to me? Bea, I want you, you have no idea how badly but I want more than an hour and a half with you. I want our first time to feel natural. I don't want to feel like we have to rush it. I also don't want you to regret it after you leave."

I put my hand on the side of her neck and kissed her, "I would never regret it with you. But I understand. I want more than an hour and a half too. I just don't want you to get tired of waiting."

"I would wait forever if I had to."

I kissed the inside of her palm, "You're too good to me."

After spending the rest of the time I had left with Allie I left to go back to the salon which was basically a mission because she couldn't keep her hands to herself and kept trying to lure me back in with one more kiss. I left with the biggest smile on my face and tried to contain it when I walked into the salon. 

Maxine was finishing up with a client and the other girl who worked here had gone home for the day. It was nearing 5:30 and I asked Maxine if I could talk to her for a moment. 

"Sure, what's up love?"

"So remember how you asked me earlier today if there was something you should know about?"

She nodded.

"Maxine, tomorrow a man is going to come in here and I'm going to need to talk to him for a while in the back. Maxine, he's a detective."

"Why? Did something happen?"

"Maxine, I-" Jesus this was hard, "I'm filing a spousal abuse charge against Harry."

I saw her try to process what I had just said and she kind of croaked out the word, "What?"

I took a deep breath, "Maxine, Harry has been hitting me for a good portion of our marriage. I've started to realize that I can't continue on like this. If I stay it will kill me, I mean that figuratively and literally."

"Bea, my God. Why didn't you say anything. Why didn't I notice? You were always hurting yourself and coming in with the weirdest stories but I believed them. I shouldn't have Bea I'm so sorry." She put her hands on top of mine. 

"It's not your fault. I didn't want you to know, I didn't want anyone to know so I worked harder at covering it up."

"Oh Bea. I'm so sorry. I should have noticed regardless. You're always covering up, I just thought you didn't like showing too much or that Harry got jealous."

"He does. But beyond that, I don't want you blaming yourself or thinking you could have done anything. I needed to want to leave, I needed to be able to be strong enough to leave and I am now. That's why I'm asking if you'll cover for me. The detective comes in tomorrow and I can only talk to him here in the salon. He can't go to my home because the neighbors will notice and doing it out in the open would be hard to do because I have to make a statement and I don't really want the whole world to hear me."

"Of course, it's the least I can do." 

She hugged me and I looked at her, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, I was just afraid."

"What about Debbie?"

"She knows, she found out this weekend which is part of the reason why I'm ready to go to the police. With her knowing and her support, I think I can do this."

"You're the strongest woman I've ever met, you can do anything."

I smiled, "Thank you. And I've decided to tell Franky tomorrow morning."

"You should make sure Bridget is there when you tell her."

I groaned, "Why, what do you think she's going to do?"

"Hopefully nothing crazy but just in case, you should make sure she's there too. Bridget is the only one who knows how to calm her down." 

I nodded in agreeance. "Well, I should get going, big day tomorrow."

"Bea, please be careful. If you need anything, and I mean anything, call me."

"Thank you." We hugged and I left the salon. I got home to Deb doing her homework and I told her about a detective coming to see me at work tomorrow.

"Wow, how did you manage to do that?"

I bit my lip, "a friend has been helping me out."

"What friend?"

We were interrupted by the door opening and Harry coming in. He said hello to Deb and told me to get him a beer. I went to the fridge to grab him some but there was only one bottle left. I opened it and gave it to him. "I should go to the store, there aren't anymore."

"Can I come?" Deb asked.

"Did you finish your homework?"

"Basically."

I nodded and she went to go get a sweater. Harry stood up and pushed me up against the wall, "I've warned you about not stocking up with things I need. If you knew I was running low you should have gotten it yesterday instead of spending the day at the fucking pier. You have responsibilities and I think you're starting to forget them, I guess I'm going to have to remind you what those are." 

He let me go and went to go sit back down like nothing had happened. I rubbed my arm and grabbed my keys. Deb and I drove to the store and I started to mentally prepare myself for what was going to be waiting for me when I got back home. 

"Are you okay?" Deb asked me. 

"I'll be fine." 

"Did something happen when I went to my room?"

"Don't worry about it. Hopefully, this will all be over soon."

Before I knew it, night had gotten here and Deb had gone to bed. I waited as long as I could to go to bed knowing what was waiting for me. I had texted Allie how much I wished I was with her rather than where I was. She said she missed me too and was was rooting for me for tomorrow. I had already texted Franky and asked if I could pop over in the morning. 

She texted back that she had barely been back a day and I already wanted to see her, that that must mean I wanted her. I smiled at the text and rolled my eyes. 

I took a deep breath and walked over to the bedroom. Harry was watching tv and I looked at the time. It was 10:00pm which hopefully meant Debbie was sleeping. The second I turned around I felt pain all over the left side of my face, he had punched me hard. I fell on the bed and he grabbed me by my hair, "You need to learn to have some respect." He punched me in the stomach knocking the air out of me. 

I gasped for air and he pulled me up again by my hair forcing my head to snap back. He threw me on the bed and turned me around so my face was being smothered by the pillows. He pulled my pants down and ripped my underwear off. I started to struggle and tried to scream out the word no but he forced himself on me and chocked me so I couldn't get the words out. It was over almost as quickly as it had started and he got off of me. I felt disgusted and violated. I slowly got up to go shower. I winced taking the rest of my clothing off and looked myself in the mirror and silently cried. 

He had punched me in the eye, it hurt like hell and was definitely going to show tomorrow no matter how much makeup I covered it with. I stood in the shower crying into my hands just wanting this portion of my life to be over with. I saw myself in the mirror and my tears started to burn my skin. He was asleep by the time I got out of the shower. I got into bed and bit my lip trying to contain the grunts of my pain. I couldn't live like this anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, so I decided to make her telling Franky a separate chapter so it could go along with her making her report to Will. I'll try to have that up sometime today.


	7. Be Honest

Bea POV 

I woke up in absolute agony. The pain in my face was the worst. I slowly got up and saw that Harry was already gone. He generally didn't stick around for the morning after because he didn't like to be faced with what he had done the night before. 

I knew that the detective was probably going to want to see some of the bruises so I wore a regular blouse and decided to put a jacket on that I'd take off once I got to the salon. It seemed useless to even try to cover up the blackness around my eye and on my cheek. I was dreading having to go tell Franky more than I was dreading talking to the detective. I decided to cover up a bit of my cheek so it didn't look too obvious and I'd just wear sunglasses to cover my eye. 

I grabbed a scarf out of the bunch I had in a drawer and wrapped it around my neck. Harry wasn't even letting my bruises heal before he'd give me more. I went to go make Deb a quick breakfast and saw her come out of her room. She saw me and seemed stuck in place, "Mom, your-your eye."

"I know. It's okay."

"No it's not. He can't keep doing this and getting away with it. We need to go to the police."

"And I am, today. I told you." I grabbed her hands. "Look, this is temporary. For the first time in my life I see the light at the end of the tunnel, I see an out. This isn't going to be like this forever, I promise you."

"I should have asked you to sleep in my room again last night, I'm sorry mom."

I hugged her, "It's not your fault. He would have done it regardless. Come on, I need to run an errand before meeting the detective and you need to go to school."

She reluctantly got ready and ate. I dropped her off at school, she was silent for most of the trip. I parked in the drop off lane and put my hand on top of hers, "Hey listen to me okay, none of this is on you. I don't want you to worry. Please, just have a good day at school and focus on your studies. I'll be alright. I love you."

"I love you too." 

I drove to Franky's house and sat in my car for a bit. I was nervous, my hands were shaking and I didn't know how I was going to get the words out. I knew her and Bridget didn't go back to work until the end of the week so they would both be home. I made sure I still had my sunglasses on and I got out of the car. I knocked on the door and Franky opened it. "Red!"

"Franky."

She hugged me and I could feel her excitement, "Oh my God Red I have to tell you about the trip it was amazing." I followed her inside and we sat on the couch. Bridget came out and said hello to me and sat near Franky. "You're going to be so jealous when we show you the pictures."

"I bet."

"Why are you wearing sunglasses indoors, you look like the Terminator."

"I'm trying out a new look." I casually joked and realized I was pushing it off the way I always did. I had gotten so used to lying about my injuries or covering them up that playing along got easy. "And I really do want to hear about your guys' trip but I need to talk to you about something."

Bridget looked at me and at Franky, "Do you want me to give you two a moment?"

"No, you should be here for this. I'm going to need you here and I have a favor to ask as well." I begged. 

She nodded and Franky looked at me, "What is it?"

"Franky um-I," I felt my chest tighten up like I couldn't breathe. I felt like I couldn't get the words out. I started to fiddle with my hand. "Franky I-I'm meeting with a detective today to talk about my marriage with Harry."

She seemed confused, "Why would you need to talk to a cop?" 

"Because, apart from filing for a divorce I'm pressing charges against Harry." I pulled my sun glasses down and Franky stood up. 

"What the fuck! That bastard, I'll fucking kill him." She got up and grabbed her keys. 

"Franky, wait no-you don't understand." I tried stopping her as she got to the door. 

"What do you mean I don't understand. He fucking hit you and I'm going to kill him, simple."

"I'm not meeting with a detective because Harry hit me once. I'm filing spousal abuse charges because it's been continual."

Franky looked at me, "What?"

"Harry's hit me before, he hits me all the time."

"The fuck are you talking about."

"I was afraid, and so I never said anything. I let it go on until I realized how bad it had gotten and I just can't do this anymore. I've started to realize that I need to get help."

I saw Franky's eyes fill with tear, "You never told me."

"Franky, I never told anyone."

"How long?"

"That doesn't matter."

"Like hell it does. I need to know how long he's been doing this to you and how long I've sat by like a blind idiot and never saw it!"

"10 years."

I saw her face completely fall, she looked shattered. Bridget walked over and put her arm around Franky, "Come on, let's take a seat." 

Franky sat down and she looked over at me, "No, that can't be right-I mean 10 years would mean that he's been doing this for almost as long as I've known you and-and he-"

She was trying to make sense of it, I would to. "Franky I wanted to say something, to tell you but I just couldn't."

"Why? You know I would have helped. I could have done something? Did you think that I couldn't that I was too fucked up that I couldn't help you?"

"Franky no-" I ran my finger through my hair. 

"Franky, I think what Bea is trying to say is that it had nothing to do with her not trusting you. It had more to do with her circumstance. She couldn't tell anyone." Bridget interjected. 

I was grateful she stepped in. I didn't know how do this without getting emotional. I saw Bridget put her hand on Franky's back trying to soothe her. I started to think of Allie and how much easier this would be if she was here with me. 

"Franky please look at me, hiding this had nothing to do with you. It was me, I was afraid of what he would do if I told you. I was afraid of what you would do if you found out. I was trying to protect you and me."

"So all those times you were hurt or making up excuses for why you couldn't go out."

I shrugged my shoulders, "Kind of became habit to hide it."

"What about Deb?"

"He never laid a finger on her. I made sure of it. But she knows now, which is why I'm going to the police."

Bridget looked over at me, "Bea, I think what you're doing is great and I don't want to discourage you from filing a complaint, I'm glad you're doing it. But you need to be careful. If Harry finds out before the charges are brought out and he is arrested, he might be something drastic." 

"That's why I'm here. I need a favor from you two."

"Anything." Franky quickly responded. 

"I know how angry he'll be. He almost killed me when he found out I called triple 0, it was the time I told you all I had been in a car accident."

Franky shut her eyes and clenched her fist. Bridget saw her and put her hand on top of Franky's trying to relax her, "what do you need us to do?"

"In a perfect world, I file the report, Harry gets arrested and gets put away. My life is far from perfect and I know him. He won't go down without a fight. So I'm asking-you two are a couple, you know Deb, you love her. If something were to happen to me and I-" I felt the tears fall down my face. "If something were to happen to me, would you guys take her?"

Franky looked at me with confusion, "Nothing bad is going to happen to you."

"Franky-"

"No, you are going to push through this, put that son of a bitch behind bars and you and Deb will have a great life."

"Franky, that is what I want. I'm not giving up, I will fight for that but I need to know that if something were to happen to me and I couldn't be there for her, you would. Franky, I'm asking, please."

I was crying at this point hating the words coming out of my mouth. Franky had started to cry too and she got up and hugged me, "Of course we'd take her you ya big sook." 

Bridget gave us a minute and I cried in Franky's arms. I could hear her get choked up, "And you're calling me the sook." I joked. 

She laughed and looked at me, "I would have helped you."

"I know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

"What are you going to do once the charges are filed? If he gets arrested and gets put on some kind of bail you can't stay at the house."

"I know, I need to start looking for an apartment."

"You can stay here."

"I don't want to intrude."

"You wouldn't be. We have a spare room. You could look for something while you're here. That way you guys aren't alone."

"Okay. I'll talk to Deb. But I should go, I have to meet the detective."

"Be careful yeah."

I nodded and grabbed my things. Bridget stopped me before I left, "It's a really brave thing you're doing Bea."

"I should have done it a long time ago."

"It's not an easy thing to do. You need to talk to someone about it. It doesn't have to be me, there are a bunch of psychologists, great ones I could refer you to. Think about it."

"Thank you Bridget."

I left their house and drove to the salon. Maxine saw me with the glasses and took me to the back room. I took off the glasses and she covered her mouth in shock, "My God Bea. That prick."

"Hopefully it will be over soon." I stayed in the back room until Maxine came to get me telling me a man named Will Jackson was here to see me. I asked her to send him through, I didn't want the other people in the salon to see me. 

"G'day, I'm Will Jackson." He reached out his hand. 

"Bea Smith."

"That new?" He said indicating to the bruise on my face.

I nodded, "Last night."

"What set him off?"

I shrugged, "it was Monday."

We sat down and he talked me through the process if I did decide to press charges, how that would look like and the things I should prepare myself for. I understood all of it, "I want to do it. I'm ready."

"Okay." He took out a notepad. "When did it start?"

"My daughter was about 5. We had been married for 6 years. It was a stupid argument and he slapped me. It got progressively worse as the marriage continued."

"He never used to hit you before this?"

"No. He was okay, a good guy. I married him because he seemed like a good man. When we had Debbie he was happy, he loved her so much. He still does. He only restrains himself from really hurting me if she's home."

"I have some of your medical records from St. Vincents and the call from triple 0 that was made a couple of years ago. I also have some noise complaints from your neighbors. Did you ever tell anyone about it?"

"A friend of mine, Liz Birdsworth. She kind of pieced it together and when she finally asked me about it I told her."

"Did she ever see Harry hit you?"

I shook my head, "he never did that in front of anyone, it was all behind closed doors. But I do have this," I pulled out a journal from my bag and handed it to him. "After that call I made to triple 0 and how badly he beat me, I started to write down every time he laid his hands on me. Just in case."

He looked over it and the numerous dates and descriptions I had written, "This is great Bea. With these and the pictures I'll take, it would be more than enough to get a restraining order and arrest him." He read one of the entires and looked up at me, "Harry forced himself on you?"

I nodded, "He didn't start doing that until maybe 5 years ago. He got frustrated with me because I never really wanted to have sex. And just like everything else, he kind of took that from me too."

"Bea, I'm so sorry."

"What else do you need?" He asked me to talk through the entire timeline of when it started and up to yesterday. He then asked if he could take pictures of my injuries. I took my scarf and jacket off so he could see my neck and arms. I lifted my shirt a bit so he could see the bruising on my stomach. 

"Bea, I'd like to take you to the hospital to do a rape kit."

I shook my head, "No. I showered, there isn't going to be anything there. And any DNA evidence you find is going to be his which he can just excuse as us having sex."

"True but there might be bruising and tearing that could indicate sexual assault."

"No, I'm not doing it. I can't do that. I've already let Harry violate me, I'm not going to let some stranger do the same by taking pictures of me."

"It could help your case."

"You already have all of this. I don't want that on record. The sexual assault. I don't want people to know," I looked up trying to stop the tears from falling. "I can't have people knowing he did that to me. It's bad enough I let him throw his weight around for years, I can't talk about that."

"Bea, sexual assault in marriages is a lot more common than people think. I know you see a rape kit as a violation but he shouldn't be able to get away with that part. He needs to be taken down for all of it. Not talking about it, not putting it in this report is letting him off on the worst part. He can't get away with this."

I wiped my tears away, "I'm afraid."

He came over to put his hand on mine, "I know. But you aren't alone. I don't want to force you to do anything, if you really don't want to, I'll leave that part out of the report. But, men like Harry need to know that he doesn't get to get away with any of this, especially when it comes to rape."

"He used to say there was no such thing as raping your wife."

"He was wrong. He forced you, you said no, begged him to stop. That is the very definition of rape, doesn't matter who he is." 

"Okay, I'll do it. But I can't do it alone. And no offense but I don't really know you like that."

"Point taken, you can call somebody. They can be in the room with you if you'd like. Allie?"

"No. She doesn't know either. I don't want her finding out this way."

"Okay, then who?"

Allie POV 

Bea had texted me earlier in the morning that she had told Franky, who after a really tough conversation, seemed okay. She texted me when Will got there and I've been waiting for an update ever since. I was nervous, anxious. 

This was meant to be a good thing, I don't know why I was worrying so much. I just wish I could be there for her, with her. I missed her like crazy. I told her I was really proud of her and that she was going to do great. I couldn't wait for that son of a bitch to be behind bars. 

Bea POV 

I didn't mean to pull her away from work but she was the only person I could think of that I wanted there for me. Liz came to the hospital as soon as I called. She came with me to a private room where I was told to get undressed and put on a gown. I sat up on a table and Liz stood by. Once the nurse came in she asked me to lay down and put my feet on the stirrups and I opened my legs. She turned a light on and started to take pictures. She took swabs and I felt discomfort and pain. Liz held my hand and I cried of the pain and embarrassment. It wasn't pain like the nurse was hurting me but it was more emotional.

I felt so open, like everything was laid out and there was nothing holding me together. She asked me to get undressed and took more pictures. I was glad when it was finally over. Liz walked out with me and met the detective. "So what now?" I asked. 

"Well, these are serious crimes Bea. We have to talk to to the Office of Public Prosecutions and and see if charges can be pressed." He answered.

"If charges can be pressed? You just got all this evidence and you aren't even sure if you can do it?"

"There is protocol we have to follow. But we have more than enough Bea. If things prosper the way I hope they will, we should be filing these charges tomorrow and be picking him up shortly after." 

I let go a breath of relief, "Okay. I just have to go one more day. I can do that."

"I'll keep you posted on any developments."

He left and Liz looked at me, "You seem exhausted love."

"I've had the day from hell, so yeah exhausted is one word."

"I'm proud of you Bea." 

I checked the time, it was a quarter passed 2. If I was going to keep up appearances I had to be home at 6, but I didn't feel like going back to the salon. And if I showed up early, Harry would know something was off. The only place I wanted to be at was Allie's. I wanted to be with her and after the really shitty day I've had I wanted to be in her arms. 

"Thank you for doing this Liz. I'm sorry I pulled you away from work at such short notice." I hugged her. 

"Anytime love. What are you going to do now?"

"I'm gonna go for a drive, clear my head."

"That sounds like a good idea, be careful."

I got in my car and drove straight to Allie's. I felt bad about showing up unannounced and almost turned the car around but I needed to see her. I knocked on her door and she opened it. She seemed excited to see me and then she saw my face, "Fuck Bea." She pulled me into her apartment and hugged me. 

"I spoke to Will. He's going to talk to the prosecution and maybe tomorrow Harry will be arrested."

"Maybe?"

"He has high hope. I'm sorry to show up like this I just really needed to see you. After the day I had, I just missed you."

She kissed me lightly on the lips, "I've missed you too."

We sat on the couch and talked. I had my head on her chest as she ran her fingers through my hair. I felt safe with her, like nothing bad could happen because I was in her arms. She kissed the top of my head and intertwined her hands with mine. 

"I might move in with Franky and Bridget for a bit while this whole thing is happening. If Harry gets bail after his arrest I need to stay somewhere safe."

"That's a good idea, she seems like she knows how to take care of herself."

"She does. And Deb really loves her." I looked up at her, "You know I couldn't have done any of this without you."

"Nuh, that was all you babe. You're amazing."

"Can't believe you still feel that way about me with half my face a shade of purple."

She brought her lips to mine, "You will always be beautiful to me no matter what. I can't believe you don't see that."

I shrugged. 

She kissed me again, "Well then I'm just going to have to tell you everyday until you finally believe me when I say you are breathtakingly stunning. I couldn't keep my eyes off of you when we first met. I could barely keep my hands to myself."

I grinned remembering that night, "Who knew Franky's little joke would have paid off in the long run." I spend the rest of the time in her arms and we just talked. The more time I spent with her, the more I realized how much I really liked her. She was funny, charming, witty. I hated that I had to leave and go back to the hell that was my life. The only good thing was that I would be able to go home to Debbie. 

I offered to give Allie a ride to work which she accepted. I kissed her as she got out and told her to have a good night and to be careful. When I got home I saw Harry's car in the driveway. One more day, that's all I needed to go through. I walked in and he was watching tv in the living room. Deb was in her room and I got started on dinner. 

Debbie came out of her room and went over to hug me, "How was your day mom?"

"It was alright, but something tells me tomorrow will be better." I winked at her and she seemed relieved. 

"I have a project I have to do, like a family tree thing, could you help me with it?"

"Sure."

Harry was pretty quiet which generally meant he felt bad about how much he had hurt me last night. He was usually quiet if he thought he went a little overboard. But some days it was hard to tell when he thought he was going easy. After Deb finished she went to her room while I picked up. 

"What did you tell her about your face?" He asked me.

"I said I wasn't looking where I was going and ran into the cabinet door when I was making dinner, because it was open it hit me hard."

"She believed you?"

"She's not asking questions so I'm assuming, yeah."

He nodded and put his hands in his pockets, "I'm sorry Bea."

I looked at him and tried to read him, "What?"

"I'm sorry. Last night, I overreacted and I'm sorry."

I nodded and he went to the bedroom. He hasn't apologized to me in a while. I must look worse than I thought. I went to Debbie's room and sat on her bed, "Okay, let's talk about that project."

"Mom, there isn't one. I just said it so you and I could be alone without being interrupted."

"Smart girl."

"So?"

"If all goes well, your father will most likely be arrested tomorrow. Franky and Bridget have offered to let us stay with them until we find a place of our own. So you should pack some things you really need. I'll put them in the car in the morning and when I get assurance he did get arrested we will go there."

"That works for me." She seemed to be holding something back.

"What?"

"Can I ask you something but you can't get mad."

"What?" 

"Mom, who's Allie?"


	8. The Beginning of The End

Bea POV 

"Mom, who's Allie?" 

Hearing Allie's name coming out of Debbie's mouth felt foreign, like something I never imagined happening. They were two separate worlds that in my dreams I envisioned would one day collide, but in reality, I wasn't sure they would. 

"Um, what do you mean?" I asked. 

"When you went to the bathroom before dinner, your phone was buzzing. I thought it was Franky or auntie Liz but you were getting these messages from someone named Allie. I didn't read them, I swear. I just saw the last one she sent that said she wanted to see you again."

I closed my eyes and sighed. I thought about it, I could lie and tell her Allie was nothing more than a client but it felt wrong to lie about what Allie and I were even if it was early days. I also didn't want to keep lying to Debbie, I had been doing that for too long now. "She's a friend, she and I met not too long ago. She actually pushed me to start looking for help, she was the one who introduced me to the detective I spoke to today."

"I like her already. But, who is she, how did you two meet?"

"I met her the night of Franky's bachelorette party. Deb-Allie is a little more than just a friend."

"What do you mean?" She asked with a confused look on her face. 

"Allie and I found each other in a time where I felt the lowest. She was there, she was kind and caring and she made me feel important. Debbie, she and I have been seeing each other."

"Like romantically?"

I closed my eyes and nodded. I waited for a bad reaction, disgust or anger. Instead she put her hand on top of mine, "Mom? It's okay-I mean I don't mind. She must be special or someone you really care about if you trusted her so much."

I nodded, "I do, trust her. I feel safe with her."

Debbie smiled, "Then she must be really great."

"Are you sure you're okay with this? I mean, I know it came out of nowhere and I didn't really prepare you for this-"

"Mom, after everything you've been through, everything you've had to live through-if being with someone like Allie makes you even the tinniest bit happy then I could care less if she happens to be a woman." 

I let go of a breath I didn't even realize I was holding in, "You are the most amazing daughter in the entire world. I don't know what I did to deserve you." 

"I love you mom, and soon, this will all be over."

I stayed with her a little while longer, lying on her bed talking to her about some stuff she was doing at school. She went to the bathroom and I could feel everything start to come together. 

Debbie POV 

I was surprised, of course I was, but watching how nervous mom got talking about Allie and the way she would slightly blush when explaining how she felt when she was with her removed any possible doubt I had in my mind. 

Of course I was shocked to hear that Allie was more than just a friend but I could care less if what she said about Allie was true. She helped her and offered her support, they were strangers and she was willing to get involved. 

When I got back from the bathroom mom had her eyes closed. It looked like she had fallen asleep and I really didn't want to wake her, she had a long day and needed the rest. I hated seeing what my father did to her and hated knowing that he had been doing this for all this time. 

I went to my dad's room and knocked on his door, "Hey dad."

He opened the door. "What's up Deb?"

"Uh mom and I were working on my project and I went to the bathroom and she kind of fell asleep. I think she'll be sleeping in my room again tonight."

"I can carry her her into bed so you don't have to share again."

"No, it's okay. I don't mind. I was just letting you know. We should just let her rest."

"Okay, sure."

I went back to my room. I put a blanket over her and turned the lights off. I got into bed beside her and closed my eyes preparing myself for tomorrow. 

Bea POV 

I woke up to Debbie right beside me, I checked the time and realized I must have fallen asleep in her bed last night. I quietly got up and went to the bedroom. Harry was still knocked out and I went to shower. I spend the entire time in the shower hoping and praying that charges would get filed and he would be arrested. I got started on breakfast and heard him get up. 

I felt the fear run up my back and realized this might be the last time I will ever have to feel like this again. I texted Allie good morning and that there was something I wanted to talk to her about a little later. 

I heard Deb start to get up and we silently realized that today could be the day that everything changed. Harry ate and went to work and the second he closed the door I looked around at this house. It was never really a home, it was attached to too much fear and animosity. My home was Deb and wherever she was. I grabbed a suitcase from my bedroom and put some clothing and things I needed in it. I grabbed a bag and put some more stuff in there too, the important things like passports, birth certificates, credit cards, and money I had hidden. 

Debbie came in and had a couple bags packed, "I'm ready."

"Me too." I grabbed her and I's bags and put them in the trunk of the car. We were going to keep up appearances, Debbie was going to go to school and I was going to go to work. Once I got the call from Will then I would pick Debbie up from school and we would go to Franky and Bridget's.

If anything did go wrong, if charges weren't filed, I would take everything back and make sure nothing looked different; that was worst case scenario. 

I drove Debbie to school and she seemed happier knowing this could be it. I drove to work and Maxine walked over to me, "You okay?"

"I will be once I know this is over." I only had two clients today and they were in the morning.

After I had finished both I saw my phone and got a text from Allie, ~Morning, is something wrong?~

~No, I just have to tell you something that happened yesterday with Deb, but I'd rather do it in person. Maybe it's just an excuse so I can see you again.~

~Bea, you make me blush. Well, then that is a very good thing because I really want to see you again soon.~

An hour later my phone rang and it was Will. Maxine looked over at me and I nodded. I answered it, "Hello?"

"Bea, it's detective Jackson."

"Yeah, hi. Should I prepare myself for bad news?"

"No. We're pressing charges now. We'll be picking him up at work in the next hour. We're just facing the beginning of the end of this."

I sat down and put my hand over my chest, "Thank you, thank you."

"You did all the hard work. You're a very brave woman. I'll be in contact soon."

I hung up and Maxine came over to me, "So?"

"They're going to arrest him. I'm free."

Maxine hugged me and I felt myself finally let go. I cried in her shoulder and looked at her, "Time to go pick up Deb."

I grabbed my bag and drove to her school. I went to the front office and asked to get her pulled out, I was taking her home early. When Debbie saw me she ran to my arms, "It's done?"

"It will be, soon. Let's go. Franky's waiting for us."

I drove us to Franky's and she was waiting for us by the time we pulled into her driveway. She hugged Deb and I when she saw us. Bridget welcomed us in and Franky helped me bring the bags in. We all talked about what was next, Franky as a legal aid was able to bring in some idea of how things were going to go. 

I got a text from Will saying they had just picked him up. "They just arrested him."

"Are you alright?" Bridget asked me.

"I just feel anxious, like I know this isn't over. He's going to fight this."

"And you'll beat him." Franky added. 

I texted the update to Allie who congratulated me. 

"Is it Allie?" Debbie asked.

I felt Franky's eyes on me with a questioning look. 

I nodded, "Yeah, I was just updating her."

"Allie?" Franky asked. 

"Yeah, mom said she met her on the day of your bachelorette outing."

"The only person your mom talked to that night was-oh my God." Franky gasped and I could see the smile start to form, "No fucking way."

I stood up and grabbed Franky's arm, "We're going for a walk." I took her outside and Franky was laughing the entire time.

"Allie, as in Alliecat the stripper. You guys are friends now or what?"

"Not quite. We've been seeing each other."

"Like-get fucked. You're dating the stripper."

"Franky shut up, Debbie doesn't know she's a stripper."

"No wait hold on. How the fuck did this happen? Where was I?"

"It happened when you were at your honeymoon. She and I connected that night, when you paid for me to have the dance. We kissed and we ran into each other after. She kind of helped me realize it was time to leave Harry because of what he had been doing to me."

"That fucking stripper. So what you two have been going bumper to bumper? You're a lezzo now?"

"Fuck I don't know. I just-I like her. I've never felt like this before."

"Awe Red, you've got it bad. Well, she's got my respect if she was able to push you enough to get you away from dipshit. But how did Debbie find out?"

"I left my phone out and she saw it, she asked me about her and I couldn't lie. It felt wrong." 

"So you two are a thing now or?"

"I don't know, we haven't had that talk. We kiss and hold hands but other than that we just talk and I just really love being with her."

Franky smiled, "As long as you're happy."

"I am. I really need to see her. I want to go back to the club tonight and go see her."

"Jesus, who knew all it took was a small dance to get you into the lady world. I should have done that years ago."

"Shut up." I laughed. 

Allie POV 

I was a bit nervous when Bea said she wanted to talk, that was never a good thing. Then she assured me it wasn't anything bad and she wanted to see me. I loved waking up to good morning texts from her and getting little updates throughout the day. 

When Bea told me he had finally been arrested I felt relieved for her. I was dreading going to work tonight, it's like ever since I met Bea I hated showing myself off for other people, especially men. 

I had a bad night the day before, a customer was getting too touchy and got physical. He grabbed my arm roughly and pushed me around but other than that I was fine. The owner made sure I was okay and got home safe but I just felt tired of all of this. I wanted a better life for myself, something more fulfilling. 

I had looked into what it would take to become a registered bartender and I'd have to take some classes and get some certificates that qualified me for that line of work. I got to work and went straight to the back. I got ready for the night, I was told I didn't have to dance tonight which I was pretty grateful for but I did have to work the floor which wasn't any better. 

I flirted and danced with some guys her and there when I got told I had been requested for a private dance in the VIP room. I groaned and nodded. I didn't know who had asked for me but they said it was someone I knew which I interpreted to be a regular. 

I put on a fake smile and walked through when that fake smile turned into a genuine one. "Oh my God Bea." I walked over to her and pulled her into a kiss. 

She kissed me back and looked up at me moving my hair out of the way, "Hi."

"What are you doing here?"

"I decided to spend my first night of freedom visiting someone important." She kissed me and I pushed her onto the couch. I straddled her and she ran her hands up my sides. 

"But shouldn't you be with Debbie? Isn't she wondering where you are?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. She knows about us."

"Holy crap, how did she find out?"

"She saw your name on my phone texting me."

"Fuck Bea, I'm sorry."

"I'm not. I told her about you and me and she's fine with it."

"Really? She's fine with her mother dating a stripper?"

"She doesn't know about the stripper part. I said I met you the night of Franky's bachelorette party and we started to get close."

"And what else did you tell her?" I leaned my lips into hers.

"That I really liked you, trusted you, and felt safe with you."

I smiled and kissed her neck, "Is that all you feel towards me?"

"Not all." She ran her hand up my thigh and I felt chills come over me. She lightly sucked on my neck.

"Bea-" I moaned out. 

She unlaced the front of my top exposing the top parts of my breast. She lowered her mouth on me and kissed and sucked as I pressed myself down wanting to feel her. I brought her lips to mine and moaned feeling her tongue in my mouth while she rubbed my inner thigh. 

She moved to kiss my shoulder and my arm when she saw the bruise. She looked at me, "Allie, what happened?"

"Ugh nothing, some jerk off got handsy yesterday. It's fine."

"He hurt you?"

"He just got a little rough but he was kicked out. Not allowed back. Stop worrying, plus for someone who has been through and seen worse you shouldn't be worrying about me. It doesn't matter."

She pulled me into her and looked me in my eyes, "You matter, you matter to me. No one should touch you like that."

I kissed her deeply and whispered in her ear, "Maybe you should show me how I should be touched. Preferably by you."

I heard her breathing speed up so I kept going. "I want to feel your hands on me, without these clothes or these rooms holding us back. I want to feel you inside of me. I want to feel your mouth on me, fucking me and touching me in only the way you could. I want your fingers buried deep inside of me while I scream your name begging you to give me more."

"Allie-" 

I tugged at her earlobe and pressed my hand on her breast. "I need to feel you."

She kissed me roughly and I smiled into the kiss. Our eyes locked, "I want to feel you too. But I need this to be over first. I want to be yours, entirely yours. No strings attached to Harry. I know it's unfair to ask you to keep waiting but-"

I shut her up with a kiss, "I would wait a lifetime if I had to. I want you to feel comfortable and free when we finally do it. If we have to wait for all of this to be over first, then so be it."

She smiled, "You're amazing."

"But can I ask you something first?"

She nodded. 

"Would you go on a date with me, like a real date. Restaurant, flowers, all of that."

She nodded enthusiastically and we kissed some more before our time was up. She told me she would text me when she would get home. 

I said goodbye to her and reluctantly finished my shift. I realized by the end of it that I didn't want this life anymore. I wanted something better for me, something better for Bea.


	9. It's Not Over

Bea POV

When I got back to Franky's house last night she was waiting up for me like a parent waiting for their kid. She was sitting in a chair and had her arms crossed looking at me, "Look how late it is, who gave you permission to go out?"

"Piss off."

Franky grinned, "So, come on, how was seeing lover girl. I want details."

"It was fine, we talked and-just talked." I blushed.

"Yeah right, look at ya, you're all red and is that a hickey I see?"

"No." I covered my neck and Franky erupted in laughter. 

"Relax Red, I'm just busting your balls. I'm glad you're happy, never thought I'd see you ending up with a woman, other than me of course."

"What a loss." I laughed. I went to the spare bedroom where Debbie and I were going to be sleeping and she was already fast asleep. I kissed her forehead and got ready for bed. I went to bed thinking of Allie and how excited I was for her, for us, whatever that meant or entailed. 

Waking up the next morning I got a call from Will saying they were going to go ahead with the arraignment today and that it would be beneficial to my case if I went. The chances were Harry was going to plead not guilty. I didn't think I could face him, I didn't want to go alone and I was afraid of what he would do if he saw me. I was talking to Franky about it while she made breakfast. 

"Well Red, if you want, I could go with you."

"Can you behave yourself?"

"I can try."

"Franky, I'm just worried. What if he doesn't get remanded or he gets put out on bail?"

"Even if the judge does let him off on any kind of bail, the prosecution is most likely going to have a restraining order put out that stops him from being able to go near you or Deb." 

"Doesn't mean he'd listen."

"If he doesn't want to end up behind bars for violating a restraining order then he will listen."

Maxine said she would cover me so I could go to the arraignment and Deb wished me luck. I was nervous but Franky sat by me and we waited until we finally heard his name called. He was brought into the room and saw me and I could see the anger in his eyes. I felt my hands start to shake and Franky put her hand on top of mine trying to calm me down. 

I could feel the hate radiating off of her. I tried to keep my head up and look strong but I felt weak and scared. It was intimidating and I just wanted this all to be over. I would be fine if I never had to see Harry again. I saw detective Jackson and he came to sit near me, "I'm glad you came. This should be quick."

I forced a smile and nodded. We heard the prosecutor state the charges and Harry's attorney plead not guilty. I had a hope he would have plead guilty, I didn't want to have to testify in court. Telling the world, my friends, my daughter, what he used to do to me. 

When the prosecution asked that he be remanded, his defense said he needed to work and couldn't risk not being there. His attorney also said he needed to be there to provide for his daughter. He wasn't a flight risk and would adhere to all the bail requirements.

The prosecutor said that I was in fear for my life and that should be more than enough to keep Harry remanded, Harry had money and he could try to run.

I put my head down and clutched my hands praying he wasn't going to be let go. 

The judge spoke, "Unfortunately, the charges are very serious. Mr. Smith here is being charged with domestic and family violence and we take those cases very seriously. I think Mrs. Smith has been a prisoner for long enough, maybe it's time her husband knew what it felt like. I'm remanding Harry Smith to Walford Correctional until his court case."

Will put his hand on mine and squeezed it, "This is good news Bea."

I smiled and Franky hugged me. Harry and I made eye contact and I knew it was taking all the restraint inside of him not to lunge over and throttle me. I walked out of the court room with Franky following me. "You alright Red?"

"I just didn't want to testify. I don't think I could do that."

"Sure you can. All you gotta do is tell the truth, nothing can go wrong."

"This was already hard enough, now I have to tell people what he actually did. Go through all of it, I can't do that Franky. I don't want Deb or you sitting in a court room listening to me talk about how weak I was because I couldn't walk away from him."

"Hey, you aren't weak. Red, you pretended to be fine for years and none of us realized, none of us knew. That's probably the strongest thing I've ever seen someone do. You did what you had to do."

"I don't mean to intrude," Will spoke "but, the trial won't be for some time. You'll have time to prepare yourself and we have a lot of resources to help you. You can talk to someone, and we'll make sure you're ready for when the trial happens."

"Thank you Detective Jackson."

"Just Will. And you have my number, if you need anything, don't hesitate."

I thanked him again and Franky drove me back to her place. Bridget was waiting for us, "How'd it go?"

"He got remand, trials set for a couple weeks from now."

"That's a good thing isn't it?"

"I just didn't want to have to speak up in open court."

"Have you given any thought to what I told you about talking to somebody?"

I nodded, "I think you're right. If I'm going to be strong enough to speak up in court, I need to talk to someone first. I'll take whatever name you throw my way."

She winked at me and told me she'd find someone for me. I grabbed my things and went to the salon. Maxine was waiting for updates and I gave her the run down. Even though I was at work I wasn't present. I felt distracted and like the day was just passing by me. I had texted Allie what was going on but even then I wasn't as vocal.

I felt off and I didn't know what to make of it. I was relieved Harry was behind bars but this little voice in the back of my head kept telling me not to get comfortable. What's written today could be scratched out tomorrow. What if the court doesn't believe me? What if he gets off? He will spend the rest of my life making me pay for it. And even if he is put away, he's always going to live in my head. His voice, his words, he was always inside of me and I hated it. 

Maxine put her hand on my shoulder and I jumped, "Sorry. I must have been somewhere else."

"Love, maybe you should go home."

I gave her a sad smile, "A home is what I should be looking for. I just don't know where to start."

"I know someone who works in real estate, I could give her your number."

"You're a Godsend. I don't know what I would do without you." I went to the bathroom and leaned over the sink. I was exhausted but I hadn't done a single thing today. 

I felt my phone buzz and answered without looking, "Yeah."

"Hey honey." Harry's voice came through the other line. 

I felt everything stop and chills run up my body. "Harry?"

"Sweetheart, I think we need to talk."

"Harry, you shouldn't be calling me. I have to go."

"Don't hang up on me." That fake voice he had on seconds ago faded away and I could hear the anger on the other line. "You need to come see me."

"I can't-"

"Yes you can. As the so called 'victim' you are allowed to come see me. So, you will."

"Harry, no. I'm not going to visit you. This is over, I can't do this anymore."

"You can't do this anymore? What have you had to deal with Bea?"

I scoffed, "A couple of nights ago you were apologizing to me for being too rough yet you still have the gall to ask me what I've had to deal with?"

"Listen to me, we can work this out. But we can't talk about this over the phone. You will come see me."

"No, I won't. If you want to see Deb I'll talk to her and take her but I won't be visiting you Harry."

I could hear the softness in his voice, "How is she?"

"Confused, I guess."

"I need to see you first."

"I'm not doing it. I'll talk to Deb and take her if she wants to see you but I'm not going to visit you."

"What do you mean if she wants to. What lies have you been telling her?"

"Harry, are you being serious right now? Lies, everything I've told her has been the truth. I'm not doing this anymore." I hung up on him. I could feel my blood boiling but I also felt scared. 

I know that he couldn't do anything to me if he was behind bars but there was this uncertainty inside of me, he was capable of anything. He was only acting innocent because they record those calls. 

I went out and told Maxine I would be going home. I grabbed my things and drove to Franky's, when I pulled into the driveway my phone was ringing again. I answered without looking, "I said no, just leave me alone."

"I hope that wasn't for me." Allie's voice answered. 

"Oh Allie, I'm so sorry. No of course that wasn't for you. I thought-ugh I thought you were Harry."

"He called you?"

"He wants me to go see him. I repeatedly told him no and I ended up hanging up on him. I thought you were him, calling me back."

"What a prick. I wanted to check up on you because you sounded different when we were texting and this kind of explains it."

"Allie, really I'm sorry. I would have never spoken to you that way."

"Hey, it's okay. You're dealing with a lot, I get it. Look, I was just calling to check up on you but also I wanted to know if you wanted to come over Sunday for a romantic dinner? I'd take you out to a restaurant but I feel like surrounded by people is the last thing you want and picking you up on the bus or in a Lyft isn't really romantic."

I smiled, "I would love that. And you don't have to worry about wowing me, I already really like you."

"Still gotta try to impress. You deserve the best Bea."

I blushed, "Thank you. Sunday seems so far away though, I'd really love to see you before then."

I could hear the excitement in her voice, "I would too."

"I'll look at my work schedule and I'll let you know."

"Okay."

We hung up and I went inside. Franky had picked Deb up from school and they were talking in the kitchen. I asked Deb if I could talk to her for a moment. 

We went to the room we were sharing and I sat her down, "Debbie, do you want to go visit your dad?"

"No way, why?"

"Because you are allowed to and you don't need to hate him if you don't actually hate him. What he did was wrong but you can still love him and want to have a relationship with him."

"Mom this is insane, why would I want to?"

"Because he is still your dad. Debbie, you never got a chance to adjust to any of this. I want to make sure you're okay."

"Mom, I'm okay. I don't want to see him, ever again."

I nodded and I kissed the top of her head, "Okay." 

"But, there is someone I would like to meet. Allie?"

"That one might be a little longer, she and I are just starting out. Figuring out what we are. We're going on our first date on Sunday."

"Mom that's great. I can help you pick out an outfit, you'll look amazing."

I laughed at her enthusiasm. I helped Franky make dinner and we sat down to eat. When Debbie excused herself to go do her homework I mentioned that Harry had called me. 

"Red, you gotta tell the cops."

"I texted Will but he didn't say anything incriminating, just that he wanted to see me."

"What are you going to do?"

"Nothing. I'm not going to see him and Debbie doesn't want to see him either. And I talked to Maxine today, she has a friend that works in real estate so I'm going to start looking at places."

"You're welcome to stay as long as you need." Bridget reassured. 

"I know, and thank you I really appreciate it. I just feel like we're intruding. You two should be celebrating your marriage and still be honeymooning."

"Oh don't worry about that Red, we still are." Franky winked at me and Bridget lightly smacked her hand. 

"Now I really want to get out of here."

Franky laughed and went to go wash the dishes. Bridget came over to me and slid a piece of paper into my hand, "She's good. She's experienced in cases like these and would love to help. Give her a call."

"Thank you, for everything."

"No worries." She went over to kiss Franky on the cheek and went to her bedroom. I was always so intrigued to see the way Bridget and Franky were around each other. They openly loved each other and were always there for one another. 

I wanted that, and I hoped I had found that with Allie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, so sorry that I took so long to update, some things came up. I'm currently working on the next chapter so hopefully it will be up sooner.


	10. Addicted

Bea POV 

I was trapped, he had me pinned down and had hit me repeatedly. He was forcing himself inside of me and putting his hand over my mouth so I wouldn't scream. But part of me wondered if he did like it when I screamed, when I was in pain, or else what was all this for. 

I couldn't escape him, he was too strong and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't move. I felt pain all over and wanted out, I wanted to leave so badly but I couldn't. I tried to fight back but it felt useless, he was always so much stronger than I was. 

I had started to cry but didn't realize this was a dream, not real life. I had started to thrash in my sleep and didn't realize it until I heard Bridget's voice telling me to wake up, telling me it was just a dream and that I needed to open my eyes. 

My eyes opened and I looked around. I had my hands on her arms holding onto her and the bed looked like a mess. Franky had a look of concern on her face and Debbie was in the corner of the room. Bridget was trying to bring me back to reality and I closed and opened my eyes repeatedly, "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for, it was just a bad dream. Darling, go get Bea some tea."

Franky went to the kitchen and I tried to regulate my breathing. Debbie hadn't moved from the spot she was in and I realized that I must have scared her. "Debbie, come here." She was reluctant but walked over. I put my hand on top of hers, "Sweetheart I'm sorry that I woke you up and scared you. I don't know what came over me."

"Are you okay?" Her big brown eyes were filled with fear and worry. 

"I'm okay, I promise. Baby, I'm sorry." I brought her towards me and kissed her forehead. 

Franky came back with some tea and I drank a bit. Bridget looked at me, "Are you alright? Do you need anything?"

"No, I'm okay. Thank you I'm sorry for waking you all up. Just one of those nights. I appreciate it, really."

"We're here if you need anything Red. Just give us a shout." 

They left and I turned to Debbie. "What happened?"

"You were moving around and it sounded like you were crying. I tried to wake you up but you kept saying help and stop. I didn't know what to do so I went to go wake up Franky and Bridget."

I pulled Debbie into a hug, "Debbie I am so sorry. You shouldn't have had to deal with that."

"Neither should you." 

"Go back to sleep sweetheart. Come on." I moved so I could hold her and I rubbed her back as she slowly closed her eyes again. Once I could tell she had fallen asleep I checked the time and saw it was around 3:30. I slowly got up and grabbed a sweater. I went out to the backyard and sat down in one of the chairs Franky and Bridget had. 

I brought my legs up to my knees and closed my eyes feeling the coolness of the air. I hated this. I thought leaving Harry would make me better, but it's making me worse. If it wasn't living with the real monster I was reliving it through nightmares and scaring my daughter in the process. 

I checked my phone, I wanted to call Allie but she was probably getting off of work and would be tired. I decided to try anyway and I tapped her contact info and called her. The line rang and she answered almost immediately, "Bea? Are you okay?"

"Hey, yeah I just had a bad night and I wanted to hear your voice."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really. Just a bad dream and I woke Deb up in the process."

"How is she?"

"Shaken. This is harder than I think either of us expected it to be."

"I'm sorry babe."

I bit my lip and smiled hearing Allie calling me babe. It changed my mood in a good way. I must have stayed silent for too long processing what she had said because she apologized, "Fuck Bea, I'm sorry. It just came out, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable."

"You didn't-it's not that. I liked it."

I swear I could hear her smile, "Alright then."

I bit my lip, "Is it crazy that I have only gone a day without seeing you and it's driving me insane?"

"I thought I was the only one. God Bea, I miss you like crazy."

"I want to see you again-I need to see you again."

"Bea, you're making me blush. And forgive me for being too candid, but knowing you feel the same way is really turning me on."

I felt my mouth go dry, "Oh yeah?"

"Mmhmm, the other night when you came to visit me, I couldn't stop thinking about your mouth on me. The feel of your hands, the way if felt to be pressed against you. It was all I could think about when I got home. I was so wet."

I licked my bottom lip, "Allie..."

"Do you want to know what I did about it?"

"Yes." I breathed out.

"I got undressed and touched myself pretending it was you doing it."

I felt this burning in my core, it was a sensation I had never felt before. It was almost a pounding feeling. 

She continued to describe what she did and I felt my ears pounding listening to her talk about the way she slipped her fingers inside of her and circled her clit wishing it was me doing it instead. 

"Allie, I don't know what you're doing to me."

"You're one to talk. I'm going to need one hell of a cold shower after this. What about you, is this getting you wet?"

I felt a blush form on my face, "Allie-"

"Sorry, too much too soon?"

"No, it's not that it's just-I don't know how to respond to that. You make me nervous." I responded honestly. 

"Are you serious? You always seem so cool and confident when we're together, when we're really close together."

"I don't even think about it, I feel good when I'm with you. But, you make me feel like a teenager."

She laughed, "Well, I'm glad I make you feel nervous because that must mean you like me."

"As if that was a question at this point."

"Hey, I still worry. You're this amazing, strong, brave woman. You're beautiful and sexy. I still have to pinch myself that you're even giving me the time of day."

I shook my head, "I'm not. You-you're the beautiful and sexy one. I couldn't keep my eyes off of you when we first met. I'm so thankful that I met you, your patience and your support has really helped me Allie. I should be thanking you for giving me any type of chance at all with me not being sure of who I am exactly."

"Well, first of all, thank you for the compliment. Nice to know you felt the same way. I always want to support you Bea, and it doesn't matter to me that you aren't exactly sure who you are. I don't always know who I am too, sometimes it takes someone else to get that out of you. But what I am about to say I need you to keep in your head and never forget."

"What?"

"You are beautiful, you are the most beautiful woman I've ever met. Don't diminish yourself. You need to start seeing yourself the way I do. And if you can't do that yet, then I am going to be reminding you of that every single day."

"You're quite the charmer you know that."

"My famous Novak charm always comes in handy I've been told."

I smiled, "Thank you Allie. I guess I'm just not used to getting compliments. They always seem like lies or things people say to be nice."

"Well I am no liar and I am a very honest person. So believe me when I say, you are absolutely breath taking. I can't stop thinking about you."

"Would you be interested in grabbing lunch before you start work on Friday?"

"Absolutely without a doubt."

"I'll pick you up."

"What a gentleman. Bea Smith I hope you aren't trying to seduce me, I might fail at saying no. I might not be able to control myself babe." I blushed and she laughed. "You're blushing aren't you?"

"How do you know?"

"One of the million things that drive me crazy about you. You're cute when you blush."

"I'm not-"

"What did I say about accepting compliments. You know what, I am assigning you homework."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You're homework is you need to start accepting people's compliments. No matter what it is you say thank you. No rebuttals, no disagreements, you just say 'thank you' and take it."

I scrunched my nose a bit, "Ugh fine, but what do I get out of this?"

"Well for one, you get the ability to finally accept a compliment and hopefully start to believe it. And second, when I see you on Friday, I'll give you a reward."

"Okay." I grinned.

"See, now that wasn't so hard. Now, as much as it is killing me, I'm going to let you go. You need your beauty sleep, even though you're already so beautiful. And I want you to get as much rest as you can possibly get."

I blushed again and covered my face, "Okay. Goodnight Allie. Thank you for answering."

"I will always answer. Goodnight babe."

We hung up and I didn't even try to hide the smile on my face. My cheeks felt hot and that bad dream I had moments ago turned into a distant memory. I was happy for all of 5 seconds before I heard a voice behind me. 

"Young lady I'm going to have to take that phone from you if you keep sneaking out to talk to your girlfriend when you should be sleeping." Franky joked as she had her arms crossed with the biggest smirk on her face.

I groaned, "How long have you been there?"

She came over to sit across from me, "Not long relax. I only heard you telling lover girl goodnight and getting something out of whatever she wants you to do. Which now peaked my interest, spill."

"It's nothing dirty you minx."

"So tell me."

"No, mind your business. Plus, why are you out here?"

"I came to check on ya." She shrugged her shoulders. "I was going to come out earlier, I heard you leave your bedroom but Gidge told me to give ya a minute."

"I'm sorry for waking you two."

"Are you alright?"

"I'm better now. I just don't know what came over me."

Franky's eyes had this look of sadness to them, "Red, do you remember what you said, what you were saying in your dream?"

"I didn't realize I was talking. Deb said I asked for help and begged for him to stop. Why?"

"When Deb called us I told her to give you some space so I'm not sure how much she heard but you kept murmuring for him to get off, you were begging for him to get off."

I stood up, "So? He used to lay into me all the time, it hurt."

"Did he just hit you?"

"Franky-I really don't want to talk about this. I'm tried and I need to get some sleep."

She nodded but that look of worry never escaped her eyes. She knew, deep down she knew. But I wasn't going to confirm it, not to her, not to anyone. I couldn't do it. Maybe it made me weak, weaker than I already felt, but it was bad enough Liz knew I couldn't have everyone else knowing too. I was taking that one to the grave if I had to. Harry took everything from me, he wasn't going to take my dignity too. 

"I'm going to bed. Thank you, and please thank Bridget too. I'm sorry." I started to walk away and heard Franky call my name. I turned around and she hugged me. Franky wasn't really the touchy feely type with anyone other than Bridget and Tess. I dropped my forehead on her shoulder and I hugged her back. We separated and I went back to bed. My mind was trying to gather all the thoughts I had in it until it finally wore me out and I was able to get some sleep. 

The day went by as normal. I still had these weird feelings surrounding me anytime I thought about Harry. Debbie seemed to have calmed down by the time I saw her after I got off of work. I had called the therapist that Bridget had recommended and made an appointment for the following week. Franky was being a lot quieter than usual, she kept to herself mostly and went to bed early. I was helping Bridget put the dishes away, "Is she okay?"

"I think she's worried about you, worried that you aren't okay. And I think she's having a hard time with all of this. She's one of your best friends and she never noticed."

"No one did, she can't blame herself for that."

"Liz noticed. Part of me is angry at myself too for not having picked it up on the few instances I met him and when you came over. She's just frustrated that she didn't do anything to stop it." Bridget got a bit closer to me and whispered, "She's also worried that there's more to the story than you're telling."

"She told you?"

"She didn't have to, I heard you say it too."

I bit my lip and crossed my arms, "I don't want to talk about it."

"You don't have to talk about it with us, but I'm hoping you do with Vera. Pretending something didn't happen doesn't make it go away. Franky is worried about you, I'm worried about you. I know you think hiding this will make things better but it won't. You can only pretend for so long before you can't take it anymore."

"Does she know, is she sure?"

"She has an idea."

"But you know?"

"I don't like making assumptions, but I'm also really good at my job. The panic in your eyes, it wasn't over a couple of beatings Bea."

"Could you just tell her not to worry, and try to get that idea out of her head. It's my problem to deal with, my burden, I have to carry it."

"You shouldn't have to do it alone."

"I'm not alone, promise. I'll work through it but at my pace. When I'm ready."

"Okay." 

I was able to sleep a bit better that night and was ready for the day to start so I could finally see Allie again. I told Debbie that we should go see a movie when I got back from work and she seemed to get excited over that. We didn't always go out to things like that because Harry always objected but I wanted to start doing it more. I wanted her to be able to enjoy the things she couldn't always do or have. 

Maxine had set me up to meet with her friend tomorrow so we could talk about what I was looking for in a place to live. I thanked her for all of it and told her how appreciative I was of her doing this for me. 

I didn't have any more clients so I left the salon and I went to go pick Allie up. I fixed my hair a bit while I waited for her in my car and she had the biggest smile on her face after she saw me. She practically ran over to my car and kissed me the second she got in. I smiled and brought her in for another kiss, "Hi."

"Hi, sorry. I just couldn't help myself." 

"Don't be sorry, I missed you too." I drove us to a Thai restaurant and we were seated towards the back. We sat across from each other and I could feel her eyes on me. I blushed and she grinned. "You did that on purpose."

"Did what?"

"Stared at me until I blushed."

"Oh Bea, I would stare at you all day if I could."

We ordered and we talked a bit about what she had been up to other than work and I listened to her talk about some yoga and meditation classes she's been taking. "Helps me relax from the nights I have to endure at work."

"Are there still people giving you trouble?"

"No more than the usual. Men too drunk to be there, walking into a room thinking they built it and that I belong to them just because they're tipping me a couple pounds. It's irritating when it turns into them thinking I would do anything for the money they offer me."

I frowned, "That doesn't seem right. They shouldn't be able to act that way towards you."

She shrugged, "it is what it is. I have been thinking about shortening my hours to start studying to become a bartender. I know it isn't really a stepping stone into a greater life but at least I wouldn't have to undress myself for a bunch of strangers."

"Allie, that's great, if that's something you want to do."

"I want a change. I can't keep doing what I'm doing anymore, I want a new life, a better one."

"I know the feeling."

She winked at me and we continued to eat. I paid for lunch despite her resistance and I drove her to work. She was still early for her shift so we sat in my car just talking and holding hands. She was looking at me and leaned in to kiss me. I sighed into the kiss loving the feeling of her mouth on mine. She moved to nip my earlobe and tugged on it lightly, "Can I tell you something?"

I nodded eagerly as she kissed my neck and put her hand on my thigh.

"I touched myself last night thinking of you."

I turned to look at her and captured her lips into mine. I moaned feeling her hand move from my thigh to my breast, pressing against it. 

"I couldn't stop thinking of you, wanting it to be you touching me instead."

I blushed profusely and she kissed my cheek. "Can I ask you a stupid question?"

She kissed me again, "Nothing you say is stupid. Ask away."

"Does it feel good to do that?"

She looked at me with a questioning look, "touching yourself? Bea have you never touched yourself before?"

I shook my head in embarrassment.

"Oh babe, it's amazing. Everyone should experience what it feels like to make themselves come by their own hands. To feel their body, understand what they like, what excites them." She leaned in to kiss me and put her tongue in my mouth. "I know you share a room with Deb right now, but you should try it for yourself one day if you get the chance."

I blushed, "I wouldn't know what to do. What if I do it wrong?"

"You can't do it wrong. It's just about listening to your body, doing what it's asking you to do." She grabbed my hand and circled the inside of my palm. "You wanna take your time with it. Enjoy your body. You start with a self massage." She looked me in my eyes and it was like she could see right through me. "It's all about teasing yourself. You lightly massage your tit, clamp onto your nipple, stroke the inside of your thigh a little bit..." she started to whisper and get closer to me, "work the clit, then you go in for the g spot."

I didn't know what to say, how to respond. I was mesmerized by her and her words. It all seemed like such a foreign thing to me. "I-I don't know if I can. I've never really enjoyed sex with Harry. What if I can't enjoy it by myself either? Sex has never really been my...thing."

Her eyes softened and she intertwined her hand in mine, "Maybe you've just been doing it with the wrong people and you never gave yourself the chance to learn how to like it."

"Maybe."

"Look, I've had my fair share of experiences where it wasn't all that great so I kind of just shut myself off and let it happen. But that's not sex Bea, it's just fucking. Real sex, good sex-" she put her hand on the side of my face and lightly caressed it, "it's in here too. You should try it sometime." She kissed me once more, "but don't push yourself. Everything should go at a pace you're comfortable with. If you need time to get ready with whatever holds you back from being able to enjoy yourself, then take that time. Like I said, I do like touching you, kissing you, and thinking about you, but if you aren't ready then we will wait as long as you want."

"You never cease to amaze me."

"I try." She grinned. "I should go. I'll see you Sunday yeah?"

"Absolutely." I kissed her and brought her in for a deeper kiss. I took control as I swiped my tongue into her mouth and heard her groan as I lightly bit her lip. 

"Fuck you're good at that. Goddamn it Bea." She jumped out of the car and I waited for her to go inside. 

I drove to Franky's and called Debbie so she could come outside. I couldn't stop thinking about what Allie said. Sex wasn't exactly what Harry and I were having, part of me was afraid he took away any possible sex drive I could ever have. But when I was with Allie she made me feel something I had never felt before. When she was talking about how I should touch myself I got excited at the thought of it. Maybe I wasn't as broken as I thought I was.


	11. For A Moment

Bea POV 

Sunday approached quicker than I expected but that wasn't a bad thing, it was good because I missed Allie like crazy. Texting and the occasional talks on the phone made me miss her even more. Debbie would tease me about how I looked when Allie was texting me which made me blush even more because she had no idea what Allie did to me. 

I had met with the real estate agent that Maxine introduced me to and she said she would pull up different houses and apartment complexes I could look at and decide then which ones I wanted to look at. Bridget was insistent that I could stay with them as long as I needed. Franky was still a bit standoffish after the other night but Bridget said she had talked to her and told her I would be going to therapy soon. I knew she still had concerns but I didn't feel comfortable talking about that aspect of Harry and I's relationship and as far as I knew, Debbie hadn't suspected anything and I planned on keeping it that way. 

Franky was drinking some coffee in the kitchen and didn't say anything when I walked in. Just because I didn't want her to ask me about Harry didn't mean I didn't want her taking to me at all. As annoying as she could be, I missed her bugging me. 

I grabbed a bottle of water and sat in the chair next to her so I was facing her. She didn't even acknowledge I was there. I rolled my eyes, "so you're just going to keep ignoring me."

"I'm not ignoring ya."

I gasped, "she speaks?"

"Piss off." 

"Come on, you can't go not talking to me forever. I know it's killing you inside and I can only imagine how much you're bugging poor Bridget."

She scoffed and looked at me, "I'm not trying to ignore you, I just don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. Whatever happened, happened. We can't change the past and I don't want to keep dwelling on it. What I would like to do is talk about a date I have tonight with this amazing woman and that I might need your help on."

Franky's face lit up and then turned into a smirk, "You need the master's help huh? What, are you trying the McMuff tonight?"

I felt a blush creep onto my face and shook my head, "No, I just need tips on how not to fuck it up. I haven't gone on a date in over a decade, let alone a date with a woman. What do I do?"

"Jesus Red fucking relax. Where are you guys going?"

"We're going to have dinner at Allie's place."

"Are you sure you two aren't gonna fuck?"

I rolled my eyes, "No. We're taking things on the slower side. But, I just get nervous around her and I don't want to do or say anything stupid."

"You won't. If you two are taking things slow then everything should be fine. Look, she seems like a cool chick, I'm sure whatever she has planned it will be sweet and sappy like most lesbians."

"You're a lesbian."

"And I like sweet and sappy shit. Fuck, you should have seen some of the dates I planned for Gidge when we were dating."

"I guess I'm just not used to all of that. I just want it to be nice and I know she's going through all this effort to make sure it is. I want to show her I appreciate it."

"Flowers, you can never go wrong with getting a girl some flowers. I'd pick up a wine too and compliments go a long way. Just be honest, she'll know you appreciate what you're doing for her by the way you talk to her. There's nothing to be nervous about okay. If she's as great as she seems to be, nothing will go wrong."

I nodded, "How long did you and Bridget wait to..ya know."

"Fuck?"

"Jesus Franky."

"Usually it doesn't take long for me to jump into bed with people, I mean look at me, who could resist?"

I rolled my eyes.

She grinned, "But Gidge made me wait. As much as I know we both wanted to, we waited until we knew each other a bit more. Maybe it was because we both had a feeling this was different, special. Part of me is glad we waited, after getting to really know her the sex just brought us closer together. Most chicks I sleep with I don't bother to get to know them because I got what I wanted. It isn't a bad thing to wait, and if Allie really like ya, she won't push."

"I'm not worried about her pushing-" I looked to make sure Debbie wasn't in hearing proximity, "I'm worried I can't wait."

Franky broke out in the biggest smile, "Bea Smith ya minx, I knew it. I knew you had it in ya. Babe, you could have told me you were so interested before I could have given you a master class before I tied the knot."

I shoved her, "I hate you."

Bridget walked in and saw me and Franky messing around, "I hope you two are playing nice." 

"Gidge, Red here needs some advice when it comes to abstinence."

I covered my face in embarrassment and could hear Bridget mouthing something to Franky. Franky laughed and drank some coffee. Bridget looked over at me, "You're in a whole new world, it's okay to be curious and to want things sooner than you expected to. There's no time limit that you need to follow in order to take that next step. Everyone is different Bea. If you feel like you want to delve into things sooner, then as long as you're comfortable with it you should do what you want."

"I just, I've never felt this way about anyone before. I like being with her."

I saw Bridget and Franky share a look. Franky put her hand over mine, "we know what you mean. Look, the best advice I can give you is don't overthink anything or put too much pressure on yourself. Things should happen naturally, don't force anything. You'll know when you're ready."

"Thank you, both of you. Now, one last thing. What should I wear?"

Allie POV 

I had begged Kaz to help me plan this date out. I cleaned my apartment inside and out and did everything I could do to make my place look nice. Obviously Bea had been here before but this was supposed to be a special date and I wanted everything to look presentable. 

I wasn't a horrible cook but I wanted Bea to live so I had Kaz send me a recipe of the lasagna she makes which is truly the best thing I've ever eaten. I made a quick salad and put some bread in the oven. I checked the time and went to go look myself in the mirror. I spent so much time working on my makeup and picking my outfit. I probably put more effort into this date than I ever did for any performance. 

I heard a knock on my door and I quickly walked over to the door. I opened the door and seeing Bea in front of me, took my breath away, "hi."

"Hi." she smiled. She handed me some red roses. 

"Oh Bea, you didn't have to."

"I wanted to." She came inside and I kissed her on the lips quickly. 

"They're beautiful babe."

"I also brought a red wine."

"Knew I liked you." I took the wine from her and got a chance to look at her completely. She had on black skinny jeans and a black deep v-neck blouse. "Fuck, you look amazing."

I saw her blush and I pulled her in for a deeper kiss. She wrapped her arms around my neck and brought me closer to her. I smiled into the kiss and pushed her up against the door. I knew my lipstick was getting smudged up but I could care less. 

A timer went off reminding me about the bread and we were brought out of our moment. I saw her eyes gleam and I kissed her quickly again, "Dinner's ready. Hope you're hungry."

"Starving." She smiled. 

I pulled the bread out of the oven and platted it and out it on the table. I pulled a chair our for Bea to sit down and I could see the nervousness coming from her. I sat down next to her. "You look so beautiful."

"You can talk."

I winked at her and served her. "Now, I can't take all the credit. I made it but only because Kaz sent me her recipe and I facetimed her like 5 times to make sure I was doing this right."

"It looks amazing. You didn't have to go through all this trouble."

"No sweat babe."

We sat and talked about the real estate agent she met with yesterday. Bea said she was considering getting an apartment for her and Deb instead of a house. "Just something different. I feel like a house comes with obligations."

"You should pick whatever you feel more comfortable with. There are some great apartments out there that I think would really help accommodate you and Deb."

"She asked about meeting you."

I was shocked, "Do you think that's a good idea?"

"You don't?"

"Babe, don't get me wrong I would love to meet her but then she'd ask about how we met and what I do for a living. Not really something I think you want around your daughter."

"None of that matters to me. And I'd like to think that what you and I are doing isn't temporary. At some point I want you two to meet."

I put my hand on top of hers, "this isn't temporary for me either. I really like you Bea and I want this to last. If you're okay with it then so am I. I'd love to meet her." 

We talked about some of our likes, dislikes, hobbies and then I found out that Bea likes to draw. "It's nothing special, I just do it when I get the chance, usually when Harry wasn't around he thought it was stupid."

"That isn't stupid. I wish I had a talent like that. I can't draw to save my life."

"You have other talents though. You're an amazing dancer."

"Well I have great people to work off of. Like this hot red head came in once, I don't think I've performed better. She really got me amped up."

"Oh yeah, she must be something."

"You have no idea. I was lucky enough to find out she was crazy enough to be interested in me too."

Bea POV 

"I think she's a little more than just interested."

I saw Allie bit her lip and I saw her get up. I watched her walk up to me and bend down to kiss me. I ran my fingers through her hair and felt her move the chair and she sat down to straddle me. I felt the heat rush up to my face. She deepend the kiss and I could feel her hand pressing against my breast. She moved to kiss my neck and I lightly pulled her hair hearing the moan leave her lips. 

She was sucking hard and I knew she was going to leave a mark, but part of me didn't care. I moved my hands to cup her ass lightly and I brought her closer to me, if that was even possible. She put her hands on the side of my face and she put a strand of my hair behind my ear, "Jesus Christ Bea, you're making it harder to stop. I'm going to have to set up some boundaries for myself."

"Maybe I don't want any more boundaries."

I saw her eyes darken and she was kissing me again. It was heated, passionate, and we were left panting at the end of it. I put my hands underneath her shirt feeling her skin, it was hot like mine. I sucked at her pulse point and felt her doing the best she could to restrain herself. She was grinding herself against me and I wanted to feel her. I wanted more of her, but part of me also wanted more of the control. 

I slowly pushed her off of me so we were both standing and I kissed her, and before she was aware I had picked her up and pushed her against the closest wall. I had her gasp when I put my hands under her but to carry her and she immediately wrapped her legs around me. We hit the wall and I heard Allie groan as I wrapped her leg around me and kissed up her neck. I whispered in her ear, "I think it's time you let someone else take control."

I could hear her breathing hitch and she pulled me into another kiss. I tugged at her shirt asking for permission to take it off and she nodded. I've seen her in sexy outfits before because of the club but it was different, seeing her like this. She was wearing a white bra and I ran my fingers over the straps and leaned in to kiss her chest, the top of her breasts. I felt her put her fingers in my hair as she moaned when I lightly raked my teeth along her chest. "Bea fuck."

She put her hands on the side of my face and kissed me. I felt her moving us so we were in her bedroom and in seconds I was on her bed and she was on top of me. She asked if she could take my blouse off and I moved so she could take it off of me. She looked at me and put her hand on my hip, "God you're beautiful." She kissed my stomach and up my chest then kissed my lips, "absolutely stunning." She continued to lick and suck my neck as she moved against me. 

I felt like I was going insane. I didn't want to keep waiting. She made me feel wanted, she made me feel sexy like I wasn't useless. I ran my hands up her arms and pulled the strap of her bra down. She looked into my eyes and reached behind to take it off completely. Seeing her breasts in front of me for the first time did something to me that I couldn't explain. I reached up and cupped them in my hands and I saw Allie's eyes close. I used the opportunity to move us so she was laying down and I was on top. She felt good in my hands. I moved my mouth down to put her left nipple in my mouth. 

She gasped at the contact and ran her fingers through my curls. I swirled my tongue around her nipple and felt her pushing herself against me. I felt her put her leg in between mine and I had to hold myself against the bed so I didn't fall on top of her. It felt so good and she kept doing it. I kissed her roughly and she moved her hands up to cup my breasts through my bra, "Can I?"

I nodded and she moved to unclip my bra when I heard my phone ringing in the distance, "You've got to be kidding me."

"Ignore it." Allie kissed me and I almost did when the ringing persisted. 

"It might be important, hold on. Give me a second." I kissed her and ran back to the living room. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I looked like a kid caught with their pants down. Franky's name flashed on the screen and I rolled my eyes, "I am going to murder you."

"Red I'm sorry but I think you should come home."

"Why, what's happened?"

"Dipshit called Deb. She's not doing too good."

"What do you mean he called her? Is she alright? What did he say?"

"She hasn't said much. She locked herself in the room. I think you need to come back."

"I'm on my way." I hung up and saw Allie leaning against the door.

"Is everything okay?"

"No. Harry called Deb and he must have said something bad to her because she's shaken. I'm sorry, I need to go."

"Don't be. Go be her mom. Call me if you need anything." She handed me my shirt and kissed me. 

"Thank you. I'm really sorry about this Allie."

"Don't be, it was fun while it lasted. I know you have priorities. I'm always going to be here, go."

I kissed her before leaving and I drove like a maniac back to Franky's. I wanted to murder Harry, he shouldn't have involved her. When I got to Franky's I ran up to the door and Franky opened it. "She won't come out. Gidge and I tried."

I ran to the bedroom and knocked, "Deb it's me, it's mum. Open up please."

A couple of seconds passed and she opened the door. She had tear marks and I moved to hug her, "Oh sweetheart, I'm sorry. He shouldn't have called you. I'll talk to the detective and make sure he isn't able to do that anymore."

We went to the bed and she stayed hugging me. "Debbie, what happened? What did he say?"

She looked up at me, "He asked how I was, and then he asked where you were and wanted to know when we were going to see him and what you were doing to try to fix this."

"And?"

"I told him I didn't want to see him ever again and that you went out. I said you weren't doing anything and that he was going to stay there. He got upset and he said that you needed to fix this. I said that he deserved to be in prison for what he did to you and he called you a liar. He said you were making it all up that he never touched you. And then-" she started to cry a bit more and I squeezed her hand.

"It's okay, baby it's okay. Whatever he said it doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters mom. He said that you lied and that he would never put his hands on you or force you to do anything. That I had to believe him because if you were telling the truth you wouldn't have recanted something you said about him raping you." 

I shut my eyes and rubbed my forehead. So Harry's idea of proving his innocence was going to be that I told Will not to charge Harry with sexual assault. It was in my original statement because of the evidence I provided with the journal but I asked Will to retract it so we made a new statement. If Harry's attorney got a copy of both they would be using that in the trial to prove I lied. That's why he was pleading not guilty. "Debbie, what your father and I went through as a couple was complicated and-"

"Is it true?"

I looked at the tears forming in her eyes and I couldn't lie but I couldn't keep hurting her either. I took a deep breath and nodded, "yes."

She stood up and continued to cry. "Mom no, he couldn't have. That's not-no." 

I stood up and went over to hug her. She cried in my chest. We stood there for a long time. I held her as she cried and at some point we had moved back to the bed. I kissed the top of her head and made her look at me, "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault. I never wanted you to find out."

"You need to make sure the judge hears about it mom."

"I can't Debbie. I'm not strong enough, I'm not-" I felt the tears start to form. "Choosing not to charge him with that was about me, I can't. I can't stand up and tell everyone that part. That's something I need to work on privately. I'm not ready to tell the world, I don't know if I'll ever be ready to do that."

"I'm so sorry mom."

"It's okay."

"No it's not. I should have protected you more."

"It is not your job to protect me. It's my job to protect you. I need you to believe me when I say, nothing you did or didn't do added to this. This is about me and him."

We sat with each other for a while, I held her and internally screamed hearing what Harry had told Debbie. I looked down to see she had closed her eyes and I moved her so she was laying down. I got up and wiped my face. I left the bedroom and saw Franky and Bridget talking. They stopped when they saw me. 

"Is Deb alright?" Franky asked.

"He told her."

"He ratted himself out?"

"Not exactly. When I filed charges against Harry, my original statement had detailed everything Harry did to me, including the areas that involved the more intimate parts. After Harry was arrested I revised by statement to have those parts removed so I wouldn't have to talk about it in court. Harry told Debbie that I must be lying because I changed my statement."

"He's a bloody idiot and I'll kill him for it."

"Me first." I scratched the back of my head. "He just scared his daughter for life trying to prove he was innocent. She's never going to get over this. The beatings were bad enough, now this?"

"It would be worthwhile for Debbie to go to therapy too." Bridget suggested.

"But she's so young, I never wanted her to be those kids in and out of sessions with shrinks. No offense."

"None taken. But it would benefit her now if she starts to struggle instead of pushing it aside for her to blow up about later. You would preventing something before it happened. Even if Debbie didn't witness any of the abuse, now that she's aware it occurred while she was under the same roof it could mess with her mind. She needs to understand it wasn't her fault and that nothing she could have done could have changed the outcome." 

"Okay, yeah I'll talk to Miss Bennet about it when I see her on Tuesday."

Franky tried to lighten up the mood. "On a better note, how was dinner with the hottie?" 

"Good. She cooked and we talked. It was nice."

"Sorry about the interruption."

"No it's fine. Thank you for calling me." I turned so I could put my hand on top of hers.

"Holy fuck."

"What?"

Franky couldn't contain the smile escaping her face, "you've got a mother of a hickey."

"Piss off." I went to look at the mirror in the hallway and she was right. Allie left me a little reminder. I smiled slightly remembering what we were doing before the phone call. 

"I want details."

"Oh baby, leave her alone." Bridget tried to intervene.

"No way. I want to know, what base did you get to?"

I gave her the finger and went back to the bedroom. I could hear her laughing from the kitchen. I laid near Deb and listened to her breathing. 

Maybe having her go to therapy wasn't a bad thing. I wanted to kill Harry for calling and making things worse. He was going to have to learn to leave her alone, no matter what it took.


	12. Breathe Again

Bea POV 

I had been texting Allie letting her know that Harry had called Deb and just upset her about some of the things he had said. I didn't tell her what Harry had told Deb but just that she was a bit shaken. Allie asked if she could do anything and I told her no, she had already done enough. ~I feel bad for disappearing on you, especially when things were getting exciting.~

~Don't feel bad, you're a good mom babe. And exciting is one word for it. You sure know how to surprise a girl Bea Smith~

I smiled at the text and thought about how close we were to crossing that line. If Franky hadn't called, I'd probably be in bed with Allie right now. The best thing about all of this was, I wasn't afraid of that. I wish we had continued. 

After maybe an hour Debbie woke up from her nap and she looked up at me, "how long was I out for?"

"Not long. But it's okay, you were exhausted." I kissed her forehead. 

"Mom, are you okay?"

"Of course I'm okay."

"No, I mean actually. Are you okay?"

"Sweetheart, listen to me, I'm okay. There are some things I need to work on for myself to feel completely whole again but I'm doing fine. We knew this was going to be hard and quite the battle, we just need to get through it. I'm sorry about the things your dad told you, he had no right. He told you something that I needed to work on first in order to ever fully have that conversation with you. But please believe me when I say that I'm okay. Part of that has to do with the support I've gotten from you, Franky, Bridget, Maxine, Lizzie, but also a lot of it had to do with Allie. She's really been there for me and forced me to open up in a way I don't think I could have it I hadn't met her."

Realization set in and Debbie seemed apologetic, "Oh mom I totally forgot about your guys' date. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"Don't even finish that sentence. Baby you come first no matter what. And Allie was very understanding. She hopes you're doing better."

"I really want to meet her mom."

"I know you do. I talked to her about it and she wants to meet you too but Deb...there's something you should know. About how Allie and I met."

She sat up and looked at me, "what is it?"

"Allie and I met under interesting circumstances. Boomer planned Franky's bachelorette night and our last stop was a strip club."

"I remember, Boomer said you got danced on by one of the strippers. Was Allie at the strip club too?"

"She was the stripper who danced on me." I waited for bad reaction and she started to laugh. 

"Oh my God mom, you're literally living the T-Pain song. You're in love with a stripper."

"I am not in love with her, shut up." I laughed with her and was relieved that she didn't have a bad response.

"Mom, look honestly, I don't care what Allie is or what she does. She obviously makes you happy, happier than I have ever seen you. She could be a drug dealer for all I could care."

"Okay, let's not get carried away. Look, I was just nervous to tell you because it isn't the most conventional work. We're both aware of that and she's trying to change it. She wants to start studying to become a bartender."

"That's so cool, maybe she could teach me."

"Not a chance."

She rolled her eyes, "Lame. But honestly mom, I see the way your face lights up when you talk to her and about her. She helped you and saw something that we all missed. I honestly don't mind."

"When did you get so amazing?"

"Get? I've been."

Allie POV 

I was cleaning up a bit and went to go sit on the couch when my phone started to ring. I saw Bea's name and answered immediately, "Well this is a treat."

"Hey, I wanted to hear your voice before I went to bed."

"You don't have to explain, I love getting late night phone calls from you. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, Deb and I talked. I told her about you."

I prepared myself, "what did she say?"

"That she didn't care what you did for a living. She liked you regardless."

"Holy crap. Really?"

"Really."

"That's amazing. You got a very understanding kid on your hands."

"Don't I know it. I was wondering if you'd like to go to dinner tomorrow night. I kind of cut this date short and I feel bad."

"I will never say no to going out with you. Sounds like a date."

"Thank you for for being so patient and kind to me. I know you could have any other woman in the world who would give you more attention and who had no problems."

"What's the fun in that? Plus Bea, there is no other woman. You're the only one that I want, only one that I think about. The only person who can do what you do to me. I've never felt like this with anyone, I'll wait no matter how long it takes."

"You're too good to me."

I smiled and bit my lip, "I can't stop thinking about you. What you were doing to me, God Bea, are you sure you've never been with a woman before because you know exactly how to rile me up."

I could tell she was smiling on the other line, "you're my first, scout's honor."

"Could have fooled me. I've never been so turned on before."

"Really?"

"Babe, I was soaking when you left."

"Maybe we could pick up where we left off tomorrow night."

"Bea Smith, are you propositioning me?"

"Maybe."

"Listen, I'll be honest with you, I'm generally a top but being overpowered by you was such a turn on. You can have me any way you'd like."

I heard her slightly laugh, "I don't know what came over me."

"Don't apologize babe, I loved it."

"Well, I should go, busy day tomorrow. I just wanted to hear your voice. I'll pick you up tomorrow around 6."

"Sounds good. Goodnight."

"Night."

We hung up and I thought about how lucky I was. Debbie didn't care, most people would have been disgusted or not been okay with what I did for a living. She must be something special to be okay with it all. As I went to bed I replayed the events that happened earlier today and how it felt to have Bea's mouth on my breasts sucking and licking around my nipple. I was so close to taking her bra off and having my way with her. The thought of it started to get me excited and I slowly moved my hand down my pajama pants to feel the wetness that had pooled in my underwear. I threw my head back as I circled my clit and imagined it was Bea doing it. Fuck I couldn't wait for tomorrow night.

Bea POV 

I woke up early to cook breakfast, it was the least I could do for staying at Franky and Bridget's for so long. Debbie got ready for school and Franky started to tease me about the hickey, "you're like a fucking teenager."

"Fuck off or you aren't getting any breakfast."

"Alright relax, no need to get testy."

After Debbie and I ate I drove her to school and kissed her forehead, "have a wonderful day. Learn something and please focus on school. I love you."

"I love you too mum, to the moon and back."

I watched her walk inside the school and I drove to the salon. Maxine asked me about my date with Allie and I told her we were getting intimate when Franky called me. 

"Harry is in asshole." 

"No kidding." I put my bag away. "That reminds me, I'm going to step out during lunch hour, I need to talk to Will about something."

"Sure love."

I only had two clients that morning and worked on them and as soon as the clock hit noon I grabbed my bag and told Maxine I would be back. I drove a bit to the destination my gps told me to go to and drove past the gates. I walked into the building and put my name down. My bag was taken into the back and I was checked to make sure I wasn't bringing anything in. I was shown to the visitors center and waited until I saw Harry walking through.

He saw me and I couldn't tell if he was happy to see me or upset, maybe a mix of both. I didn't stand up so he didn't even try to pretend to want to give me a hug. He sat down and looked at me, "About friggin time."

"I'm not here to hear you out, I'm here to warn you. If you ever pull another stunt like you did yesterday I will ruin you. You have screwed up any perception Debbie had of you and me being in a happy marriage in order to prove some idiotic point."

"That wasn't my intention."

"Your intention means jack shit. Debbie now knows you used to beat me and rape me on a periodic basis and it's fucked with her head. Maybe you should learn how to think before you speak."

"Watch your mouth."

"Or what? What are you going to do? I see about 4 guards here, I dare you to do something to me with all these witnesses and people to pull you off of me."

He clenched his jaw and looked at me, "So what, you think you're strong and brave now? You're nothing, you'll never be anything. You're mine and you belong to me."

"No I don't. I've finally understood that I am my own person Harry and that I never needed you. I was an idiot for staying as long as I did, but I won't ever back down and make that mistake again. And you're an idiot for telling Deb because now that gives me no reason to charge you with sexual assault if she already knows."

"You are going to drop all the charges and tell those idiots that you lied and get me out of this hell whole."

"No. I'm not doing it."

"I wasn't asking." He grabbed my arm roughly and he suddenly tightened his grip. "What the hell is that?"

I saw he was looking at my neck and I tried getting out of his grasp, "let me go."

"So that's what this is all about? You make up this crap about me just so you can run off with some other poor bastard. Well, let me tell you this, when I get out of here I am going to make both of you pay. You're going to be sorry for this I swear to God."

"Fuck you. This has nothing to do with there being somebody else. It has to do with the fact you are an abusive good for nothing husband."

"Shut your fucking mouth." He kept tightening his hold on me until a guard saw us and told him to let go. Harry waited a moment looking me in my eyes and finally did. "You're going to pay for this. I'll kill you."

He got escorted out and I drove to the police station. I went looking for Will, when he saw me he looked concerned, "Bea what is it?"

"I went to go see Harry. He threatened me and did this." I showed him my arm and he made me follow him to his office. 

"Okay, let me see." He saw the forming bruise and started to take pictures. "Why did you go see Harry?"

"He called Deb last night and basically told her he used to force himself on me. I went to go tell him that he was never to call her again and he got angry with me once I told him I wasn't helping him get out."

"Jesus Bea. You could have gotten really hurt."

"Is it weird I kind of wished he had done something worse to me? There are cameras and people around, I wanted to catch him in the act."

"I'll get a warrant to take the prison's footage of him putting his hand on you. Could be of some use."

"Thank you. I should get going."

"I'll call you with any updates and I'll see what I can do about getting his phone privileges revoked."

I went back to the salon and finished up on any clients I had. I did some paperwork waiting for the time to get closer so I could go pick Allie up. Maxine said goodbye to me and wished me luck on my date, "hopefully no interruptions this time around huh."

"Hopefully. Bye." I locked up and drove to Allie's. She came down and looked absolutely beautiful. 

I kissed her as soon as she got in and smiled when we separated. "God I missed you."

I laughed and I drove us to a restaurant not far from her place. We walked in and we were seated at a round booth area. The place was nice and had some darker undertones to it. Allie thought it was really cool and we started to order. She intertwined her hand into mine and started to whisper how sexy she thought I looked. She moved her hand up my arm to wrap hers around me when I lightly groaned. It was barely noticeable but she did. "I'm sorry babe, did I hurt you?"

I barely missed a beat. "No, I just hit myself against a cabinet at work." 

She moved to look at me, "Bea, are you being honest with me?" I bit my lip and took my sweater off. Allie grabbed my hand and moved it towards the light so she could see my arm. "Bea, but how?"

"I went to go see him today."

"What? When? Why?"

"Today during my lunch hour. I went to tell him to stop calling Deb and how stupid he was for doing it in the first place. He did this because he saw a smaller bruise someone decided to leave me on my neck."

"Fuck Bea, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking and-"

I shut her up with a kiss. "I'm not sorry. I don't care if he knows. He can't ever hurt me again," I whispered in her ear, "and I like when you can't control yourself around me."

"Well, just get more of these drinks in me then you'll really love me."

I shook my head and laughed, "look don't be sorry. And I don't ever plan on going back, I promise."

"It's not that I think you need to run everything by me I just worry about you. I don't want you getting hurt."

I kissed her on the lips, "Awe Allie Novak, are you just one big softie?"

"Shut up."

"It's cute." She rolled her eyes and I kissed her again, "I like that you're so protective. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

We talked about her day and she told me she had started to enroll in some classes for bartending. I told her how proud of her I was. She seemed happy and I wanted her to do whatever it is would make her happy. As we finished eating the waiter asked if we wanted desert. I felt Allie run her hand up and down my inner thigh and she shamelessly whispered in my ear, "oh I want dessert all right." I felt a blush forming and I shook my head. The waiter smiled and went to go get the bill. 

I brought her in for a kiss, "you are bold."

"I've been told. But when I see something I like, I'll do whatever it takes to get it" she winked at me.

We fought for the check until I told her to behave or else. She seemed both shocked and excited she didn't realize that the bill had been taken away. We held hands and walked to the car. I drove her to her apartment and I went up with her. In mere seconds I was being pushed against the door and I could feel her pushing my sweater off. We kissed our way to the bedroom and our clothes couldn't come off faster. We were left in just our undergarments and no matter how hard I tried to take control, Allie had a way of taking it away. She kissed me and lightly traced her fingers up my leg. "Let me show you how I feel about you, please. I know you want control but I've been dying to taste you since the moment I met you. I might die if I don't get the opportunity to."

I nodded and she kissed me deeply. Her hands moved to unclip my bra, this time with no interruptions. She slowly pulled it down my arms and looked at me entirely. I felt exposed and I think she could sense my discomfort, "don't overthink this. I just can't believe you're real. Jesus Bea, you're so fucking sexy." I didn't get the chance to respond because her mouth was on my breast. I bit my lip as she sucked on my nipple and I could feel a burning in my core. She used her hand to massage the other one. I didn't know how good this could feel. It seemed so simple yet my body was on fire. 

She started to rub her fingers on the outside of my underwear and I practically whimpered when she added more pressure. "Can I?" She asked and I nodded. 

She slowly pulled my underwear down and opened my legs slightly. She kissed up my thighs and licked up my slit. Having never experienced what good sex felt like, I was a bit overwhelmed when that first wave of pleasure hit me. I gasped as she started to lick through my folds and I couldn't believe the moans I heard coming from my mouth. She started to circle my clit with her tongue while using two of her fingers to enter me slowly. "Allie oh my God."

"Tell me what you need baby."

"I don't-fuck I don't know. More..more..I need more."

She moved faster and I could feel myself getting closer. She moved one of her hands up to touch my breast and I wrapped my leg around her. She was working wonders with her mouth and I practically screamed her name as I came. It took me a bit to recover but Allie wasn't letting up. She was already working her way to my second orgasm when I had barely recovered from my first. 

"Allie-I don't know if I can...fuck." I felt my breathing get a bit more labored as she never stopped. 

She lifted her head a bit but continued to pump her fingers in an out of me, "I know you can baby, you're doing so good. You look so beautiful. I know you can." She added another finger and I almost lost my mind. 

I threw my head back and put my fingers in her hair pulling it as she brought me to my second orgasm. I probably yelled out every bad word in the book but I could care less. The things she did to me I had never experienced with anyone else, ever. I saw her lick her fingers clean and kiss up my body. She kissed me roughly and let me taste myself.

"Good?" 

"Like you have to ask. I think your entire apartment complex heard me call out your name."

She grinned and kissed me again, "good." She sucked on my earlobe and pulled it lightly with her teeth. "Plus, it wasn't hard, you taste amazing."

I blushed and she kissed my the area of my arm that had the bruise on it. She looked up at me and kissed me over and over again. I pulled her closer to me and I unclipped her bra letting it fall to the side. I kissed her breasts the way I did yesterday and moved us so she was on the bottom. I went to pull her underwear down when she stopped me, "Bea you don't have to do anything you don't want to."

I kissed her, "I want to. I just don't know what to do."

"Just do whatever feels right. You don't have to go down on me if you don't want to, you just use your fingers if you feel like it."

I nodded and felt this heat coming from her. I used one of my fingers to touch her, she was so wet. I saw her close her eyes and I continue to move up and down watching her breathing accelerate. I know I tasted myself on Allie but I was curious to see what she tasted like so I removed the finger I was using and put it in my mouth. "Bea, I know I said no rush but after seeing that I really need you to fuck me."

The taste was different but it wasn't bad, I liked it and realized I wanted more. I inserted two fingers and saw her squirm. I placed my mouth on her clit and I heard her moan loudly. I tried to mimic the things she did to me and in no time she started to beg me to let her cum. I rubbed circles on her clit as I continued to eat her out. She came and I licked every last drop enjoying the taste and the reactions I would get out of her. 

I slowly kissed up her body and she pulled me into a kiss. "So you really expect me to believe I'm your first after that."

"Was it good?"

"Better than that." She brought her lips to mine and we intertwined out hands as I moved on top of her. She sat up and wrapped my legs around her waist. She was sucking on my breast as I felt her move her hands up my back. I grinded against her and this moment felt like the most intimate one I've ever had. She sucked my neck lightly, "someone seems eager to go again. God Bea you're so wet."

She touched me again and it felt like something I could never get tired of. I don't know how it was possible, I went all these years never having moments like these with Harry and I was fine. Now, it was all I wanted with Allie, to be in this position with her forever. After she got me to come again we saw that time had passed by quicker than either of us had expected. It was really late and I had to get back to Franky's. We struggled to say goodbye to each other with Allie doing everything she could to get me to stay the night, and I mean everything. 

When I finally made it to the door our lips were locked and I truly thought I would never be able to leave. She twirled some of my hair between her fingers and kissed the top of my nose, "Okay okay, I'll let you go. I'll miss you and I'll probably sleep better than I ever have."

"Me too. Thank you."

We kissed again before I went downstairs and got in my car. I thought having sex after Harry would be scary and awful but it wasn't. When I was with Allie I felt like a new woman, like I was with someone I could trust entirely. Harry and all of that crap didn't matter. She had me, and I knew I was in deep.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all. This is a new story idea that I've had in my head for a while so please let me know if you liked it or not. I wanted to do something different than my first story and I plan on keeping this one strictly Bea and Allie with mentions of other characters here and there. Let me know how you guys feel about it.


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